


𝙏𝙤𝙪𝙘𝙝𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣! － 𝘛𝘸𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮

by angelnochu



Series: 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘴★⌒ヽ(╹꒳╹)b [1]
Category: TWICE (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Chaeyoung is just there, Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Established Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Gay Panic, Humor, Jeongyeon wants to fuck up Jimin, Jihyo wants to go home, Jungkook thinks Yoongi and Mina are sus, M/M, Mina and Yoongi are sus, Momo doesnt know what to do, Multi, Nayeon is just there, Problems, SO COOL, SUSPENSE!!!, Sana is still a baby, Taehyung is tzuyu's father, Texting, Wow, bts - Freeform, chaotic - Freeform, dahyun and Namjoon are a lil salty, hobi and tae adore tzu, jimin loves momo, she also fights Kookie, stupid, twice, we must protect, yes - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:53:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24429055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelnochu/pseuds/angelnochu
Summary: yoda [21:04]help. how do you start a washer again??tigerrawr[21:04]why the hell are you washing your clothes at 9 o'clock at night?yoda [21:04]im not washing clothesjinisbest [21:04]thenwhat are you washing?yoda [21:05]thats..not important.
Relationships: Established Relationships, F/F - Relationship, F/M - Relationship, M/M - Relationship
Series: 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘴★⌒ヽ(╹꒳╹)b [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1764151
Comments: 21
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> texts i believe would be shared between the members.

hi :) i started this texting fic bc i was really bored so don't expect a lot from me. 

(i have small fingers, im sorry:<) anyway,

_ **welcome to touchdown!** _

**meet the idiots**

**-bts-**

**kim seokjin :**

_"shut your piehole, pesant."_

-that one mom that lets her kids shit at the park but is also all "you're doing great, sweetie :)"

-always fighting with the tanner line (fullhouse if ykyk)

-created his own twice fanchant for dance the night away

-LOUD on the chat and can't shut up til' you tell him he's pretty.

-'dahyun and i should be in a k-drama'

-first of the slytherin duo

**min yoongi :**

_"i can't seem to find where i asked for your opinion."_

-savage af but everyone knows he's soft :)

-always making the problems worse by just shouting nonsense words.

-always fighting with the tanner line.

-buys and pre-orders all of twice's albums and owns his own candybong.

-'i think you should shut up.'

-last of the slytherin duo

**jung hoseok :**

_"ok but...what r e a l l y is cheese?"_

-20% of twice's streams.

-showers everyone with love and affection but can be a bitch

-'the squirrel is the superior mammal, fight me.'

-can't seem to insult tzuyu, idk either ( though she can roast him all damn day)

-babys twice's j-line + tzuyu <3

-a supportive dad for the best girls

-first of the tanner line

**kim namjoon :**

_"my braincells are slowly dying, help."_

-iq of 148 but is a real dumbass

-can't ever find one of his airpods, idk

-'iM lIkE TT, AaAH, jUsT LiKe TT, AAaAAaAHHh!'

-learns twice choreo until 3am but wont admit (yet all we hear at 2am is "lEtS dAnCe ThE nIgHt AwAy!")

-actually a full on crackhead, but still the smartest here.

-his convos always turn into how crabs are the superior animal and gets into fights with hoseok.

**park jimin :**

_"shut up, im adorable."_

-a real petty ass when someone calls him short or roasts him.

-has beef with jeongyeon but we don't know what it is.

-adopted momo and no one can tell him otherwise (he bites)

-'i swear, im sober'

-flirts with everyone??? the biggest player ever

-one fourth of the power couple line

**kim taehyung :**

_"hold on, i see a dog."_

-big onceu fanboy <333

-started the chat in the first place and still types deep paragraphs on how much he adores and admires the girls and gets blocked immediately. 

-'what rhymes with 'i love twice?' '

-is constantly buying posters to put in his room (twice and jimin posters:3)

-owns probably every twice merchandise ever made and keeps everything in a glass display.

-writes fanfics of twice and them

**jeon jeongguk :**

_"thats not normal, man. you could die"_

-won't shut up about the time when IU shook his hand

-stans all jyp artists but ults twice

-'annyeonghaseyo jeonun bangtan sonyeondan-'

-always starting half of the stupid problems in the chat

-argues with nayeon about who's the better bunny.

\- two-fourths of the power couple line

**-twice-**

**im nayeon :**

_"hot cheetos are for sissies."_

-sends voice notes of her yelling or cackling evilly. 

-'i have the best forhead here. periodt.'

-babys taehyung and fights with the rest of the boys

-the bestest unnie you could ever ask for (but a fake maknae)

-fighting with jk every 2 seconds

-found out about taehyung's fanfictions and called him out on the chat 

**yoo jeongyeon :**

_"idiot."_

-is always accidentally burning everyone to a crisp and doesn't feel bad about it.

-probably the only sane one (besides mina)

-has beef with jimin and no one knows what it is.

-'please be quiet. you are violating my eardrums.'

-expresses her emotions very clearly in the chat (and it scares everyone)

-loves the twice members and insults bangtan

-no one knows if she actually likes bts or if she's just there to make fun of them idk.

**hirai momo :**

_"what sound does a giraffe make?"_

-spaces out all the time.

-is always sending pictures of everything she eats in a day

-spends a lot of time learning bts choreos and brags about how much of a better dancer she is

-'everybody say NOOOOO-'

-doesn't know what is happening half the time

-clueless baby

**minatozaki sana :**

_"monkeys are EVIL"_

-sends lots of deep 3am thoughts or memes (choose wisely)

-uses text to speech more than anyone here

-probably needs to see a psychiatrist but refuses and will smite anyone who forces her to.

-'i think im allergic to humans'

-streams all dna all night long to get it to 1B

-second of the tanner line

**park jihyo :**

_"i do not know you anymore."_

-the god of them all (their ruler, superior, master..)

-'how do you send a photo again?'

-can sometimes be an immature child to get her way and it (almost) always works

-doesn't give a crap and steals your food anyways

-kind of a weirdo but is still a cute baby

-no one here deserves her

**myoui mina :**

_"please stop whispering, its hurting my ears"_

-the one in the chat that has to tell them to STFU and GO TO BED

-very very very very scary when shes mad

-'trust me, i feel happiness'

-likes to send pictures of penguins randomly

-will leave you on read

-three-fourths of the power couple line.

**kim dahyun :**

_"haha, thats not funny."_

-literal walking tofu

-gets teased about her pale skin and ends up getting triggered and goes insane on the chat

-best friends with seokjin (they share one braincell)

-'shut up or i'll eat your toes'

-CONSTANTLY playing spinebreaker and the choreo

-will fight you with emojis 

**son chaeyoung :**

_"rawr"_

-chaotic with 'ahdjsjsjs'

-'159cm!11!!!111!1!1!'

-rages on the chat for no reason and backs away to see the mess that she created

-kills anyone who tells her she's short

-violent but soft<33

-final fourth of the power couple line

**chou tzuyu :**

_"hurry, whats a good comeback?"_

-has no respect for her elders

-'i can hurt you'

-can be either reaaaaaaally mean or reaaaaaaaaaally soft uwu

-hyper maknae

-will also burn you to a crisp

-final member of the tanner line.


	2. the washing machine incident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> texts i believe would be shared between the members

**gay beans and shit**

**_yoda_ is typing...**

**yoda [21:04]**

help. how do you start a washer again??

**tigerrawr[21:04]**

why the hell are you washing your clothes at 9 o'clock at night?

**yoda [21:04]**

im not washing clothes 

**jinisbest [21:04]**

then

what are you washing?

**yoda [21:05]**

thats..

not important

**stfu.yoongi [21:05]**

?

**hobihobihope! [21:05]**

hon, turn the knobs to cold water and to delicate wash 

depending on what you're washing tho.

**yoda [21:05]**

thanks hobi <33

also i will not specify what im washing.

**ohnomina! [21:06]**

um

why?

**jeongyeon:) [21:06]**

why cant you tell us, tzu?

**chimin [21:06]**

oh!! i know!!

**jeongyeon:) [21:07]**

oh god.

**chimin [21:07]**

fuck you.

**taebear [21:07]**

woah there

calm down

**crabcatcher[21:07]**

yeah, listen to taehyung

**taebear [21:08]**

thank you, hyung :)

**crabcatcher [21:08]**

np. 

now, let me go back to my very professional work.

**dubu? [21:08]**

you mean learning our choreo and blasting the music from

upstairs?

that's what you call work?

wow.

**crabcatcher [21:08]**

how dare you???

**dubu? [21:09]**

¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**crabcatcher [21:09]**

scoff

_**crabcatcher** _ **has left the chat**

**dubu? [21:09]**

idiot.

**yoda [21:09]**

haha.

now.

I just put in the load.

**ohnomina! [21:09]**

OF WHAT!??!?!??!

**hobihobihope! [21:09]**

please don't yell at my child, mina~~

**ohnomina! [21:09]**

fine.

tzuyu, what are you washing?

**hobihobihope [21:10]**

:)

<33

**yoda [21:10]**

<33333

um..

**honeypunchsana [21:10]**

umm..

tzu?

**yoda [21:10]**

hm?

**honeypunchsana [21:10]**

why did you put a bunch of coins and bras in the washing

machine?

**nabongs [21:10]**

whaaaat theee fuckkkkkkkk

**godjihyoyourass [21:10]**

what-

why-

TZUYU!!

**ggukkie_ [21:11]**

lmao

bras and coins

lmao

**stfu.yoongi [21:11]**

what was going through that small brain of yours

**jinisbest [21:11]**

ikr.

are you trying to break our WASHING MACHINE?

**yoda [21:11]**

uh

**hobihobihope! [21:11]**

do not BULLY MY BABY

**dancingmomo [21:12]**

oh no

tzu.

**yoda [21:12]**

i know

**chimin [21:12]**

huh?

**jeongyeon:) [21:12]**

idiot.

**chimin [21:13]**

bitch.

**jeongyeon** :) **[21:13]**

petty ass.

**chimin [21:13]**

flat ass

**jeongyeon:) [21:13]**

slut.

**chimin [21:13]**

:0

you evil fucker

**godjihyoyourass [21:14]**

hey dumbasses,

shut up.

**jeongyeon:) [21:14]**

sorry..

**chimin [21:14]**

sorry...

**godjihyoyourass [21:14]**

ty.

now, tzu

back to you~

**tigerrawr [21:14]**

yeah, what the hell??

**yoda [21:15]**

okay.

well..

so, me and momo were dared by onces on the recent vlive we did

(earlier this week) 

and they asked us to break our washing machine.

and so we did.

**dancingmomo [21:15]**

ya :P

**nabongs [21:15]**

what??

onceu!

whyY

**chimin [21:15]**

ugh. our fandom's better.

**jeongyeon:) [21:16]**

shut the fuck up or i'll come over there and kick your ass.

**honeypunchsana [21:16]**

you'd do that??

for once??

AW I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, JEONGYEONN!!!

**jeongyeon:) [21:16]**

ily too <3

**yoda [21:16]**

anyway.

sorry that i broke the washer.

i'll buy a new one :3

**taebear [21:17]**

nononono

i'll buy a new one :)

**hobihobihope! [21:17]**

bitch, she's MY child

**taebear [21:17]**

bitch, she's MY life

**dancingmomo [21:17]**

this is why i let jimin adopt me.

he isn't possesive like you.

**ggukkie_ [21:18]**

the fuck you say?  
momo, i love you and all but BITCH PLEASE

**dancingmomo [21:18]**

um..excuse me?

**chimin [21:18]**

baby, let me handle this. 

JEON FUCKING GGUK GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE FOR  
CALLING MY DAUGHTER A BITCH, YOU LITTLE BRAT!!  
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**tigerrawr [21:18]**

oh no you made him mad.

**nabongs [21:19]**

see what you did????

golden maknae my ass.

**ggukkie_ [21:19]**

PLEASE

IM SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU   
JUST ASK SANA

**nabongs [21:19]**

sana, you brat.

**honeypunchsana [21:19]**

i love you too :')

**yoda [21:20]**

how did this conversation turn from me breaking the

washer to gguk and nayeon arguing (again) about who's better??

**stfu.yoongi [21:20]**

your guess is as good as mine.

**yoda [21:20]**

huh.

k.

**nabongs [21:20]**

_[voice note: 30sec]_

.

.

.

.

.

**hobihobihope! [21:21]**

that was the most terrifying cackle i've ever listened

to in my entire life. 

**ohnomina! [21:21]**

welcome to my life :)

**hobihobihope! [21:21]**

shit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> long story (not really it's really short) short,
> 
> -tzu didn't get in trouble for breaking the washer (ofc)  
> -jimin beated the fuck out of gguk  
> -nayeon isn't talking to gguk anymore, apparently (lmao no)  
> -the rest of them are just done.
> 
> :)


	3. the alleged vegetarian phase

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i changed the format a bit hehe

**gay beans and shit**

**_dancingmomo_ is typing...**

**dancingmomo [13:44]**

hello friends

i have an annoucment

**taebear [13:44]**

youll FINALLY agree with me that watermelon is actually GOOD?

**dancingmomo [13:44]**

what

no

its distgusting

**ggukkie_ [13:44]**

what did watermelon ever do to you? :(

anyway

me and momo actually decided on something this morning

**stfu.yoongi [13:45]**

that you both went through my computer and DELETED PARTS OF MY SONG??????????

**dancingmomo [13:45]**

shit

nono no not that

**nabongs [13:45]**

lmao

**tigerrawr [13:45]**

what then

**ggukkie_ [13:45]**

where is everyone????

**chimin [13:45]**

sorry im late its just that JEONGYEON WOULDN'T SHUT THE HELL UP

**jeongyeon:) [13:45]**

ME???

WHAT DID I DO?????

**chimin [13:45]**

you know what you did😠

**jeongyeon:) [13:46]**

i hope you die🖕

**chimin [13:46]**

**🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬**

**tigerrawr [13:46]**

SHUT UP IDIOTS

**chimin [13:46]**

YOU BE QUIET SHORTIE

**tigerrawr [13:46]**

SAYS YOU

**chimin [13:46]**

🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬💀💀💀💀 **🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕**

**honeypunchsana [13:46]**

i think you broke him

**taebear [13:46]**

shhh its okay~

**hobihobihope! [13:46]**

heY

thats mYY baby???

**taebear [13:47]**

go to your other babies!!

**ohnomina! [13:47]**

hi

**yoda [13:47]**

hi

**jinisbest [13:37]**

he just ran out of his room so expect an out of breath hoseok

**yoda [13:47]**

ew

**ohnomina [13:47]**

i have taught you well

**dancingmomo [13:47]**

HELLO???????

HAVE I BEEN FORGOTTEN ABOUT HERE?????????????????

**chimin [13:47]**

baby baby baby

**honeypunchsana [13:48]**

wanna be a brand new girl

**chimin [13:48]**

SHUSH

momo, baby, nonono we haven't forgotten about you

**stfu.yoongi [13:48]**

lmao yes we have

**chimin [13:48]**

SHUT UP

**dancingmomo [13:48]**

**😰**

**ggukkie_ [13:48]**

look momo

just go ahead and tell them already

**dancingmomo [13:48]**

okay then

um

friends,

family,

sisters,

brothers,

enemies,

foes

**jeongyeon:) [13:48]**

hoes

**dancingmomo [13:49]**

no

anyway

as you may all know,

me and gguk are lovers of the great invention called food

**ggukkie_ [13:49]**

yes

**dancingmomo [13:49]**

and especially the catergory of protein

**ggukkie_ [13:49]**

yes

**godjihyoyourass [13:49]**

momo just get to the point

im trying to stop dahyun from hurting namjoon

**honeypunchsana [13:49]**

um

why?

**godjihyoyourass [13:50]**

we will talk about that later

what were we talking about?

oh yeah momo

continue

**dancingmomo [13:50]**

thank you

me and jeonggukie have officially decided that...

we are officially going vegetarian

**dancingmomo [13:53]**

um where did you guys go?

**jinisbest [13:53]**

HAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHH  
AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

**ohnomina! [13:53]**

thats so dumb

im sorry LOL

**jeongyeon:) [13:53]**

this is GOLD

i just screenshoted this lmao

**taebear [13:53]**

im so sorry momo but

IM CRYING 😂😂

**chimin [13:53]**

uhmm baby,

what were you both thinking?

**ggukkie_ [13:53]**

hey :c

**dancingmomo [13:54]**

stop teasing :(((

me and gguk recently watched a documentary on how the poor animals are taken to a slaughterhouse and killed there :c

and we couldn't do that to the beautiful lamb and chickens <33

**ggukkie_ [13:54]**

yes so we are taking action and saving them <33

**dubu? [13:54]**

yeah i watched that one too

but then i realised i couldn't live without chicken😋

**crabcatcher [13:54]**

same

**dubu? [13:54]**

shut up hoe

**crabcatcher [13:54]**

fine then

;(

**godjihyoyourass [13:55]**

**🙄**

**chimin [13:55]**

sorry to say this baby,

but i don't think you two will be able to last??

**ggukkie_ [13:55]**

and to think we were friends >:c

**chimin [13:55]**

💜💜💜

better?

**ggukkie [13:55]**

yes :(

**dancingmomo [13:55]**

you dont think that i'll be able to last??

whyyyy :c

**chimin [13:55]**

because

i know you love jokbal

and literally everything else

**taebear [13:55]**

except WATERMELON

**stfu.yoongi [13:56]**

shut up idiot

**taebear [13:56]**

no one hates on watermelon!!!!

**hobihobihope! [13:56]**

just got back from giving all my love to sana and mina

momo and tzuyu youre next btw

**yoda [13:56]**

oh no

**hobihobihope! [13:56]**

but momo you and jk are going vegetarian??

lmao im sorry but no

**ggukkie_ [13:56]**

WHY IS EVERYONE DOUBTING US

**dancingmomo [13:56]**

we will prove you wrong!!

**jinisbest [13:56]**

yeah

okay

* * *

**jinisbest [02:03]**

how much do you wanna bet that they wont be able to make it?

**stfu.yoongi [02:03]**

its 2 in the fucking morning jin what the hell

**dubu? [02:03]**

25.000 won

**jinisbest [02:03]**

ok

how long do you think theyll last?

**dubu? [02:04]**

lmao 1 day

did you see how gguk was drooling over our pork belly tonight??

**honeypunchsana [02:04]**

same with momo

4 days 

25.000 won

**jinisbest [02:04]**

k

**yoda [02:04]**

i say 2 days

oh and taehyung says 3

**jeongyeon:) [02:04]**

i say until they wake up

**crabcatcher [02:05]**

approximately 8 hours

**dubu? [02:05]**

no 

**jinisbest [02:05]**

ok ok

anyone else??

**ohnomina! [02:05]**

5 minutes after they wake up

**hobihobihope! [02:05]**

you guys are mean :(

but i say 5 days :)))

**chimin [02:06]**

hobi!!!

im not betting :c

**jinisbest [02:06]**

no duh theyre the loves of your life

**chimin [02:06]**

shut up

**nabongs [02:06]**

im giving them hope and ill say a week

**tigerrawr [02:06]**

10 days! 

i'll be nice and say 10 days

**stfu.yoongi [02:06]**

oh wait were actually doing this?

okay well then 1 day

**jinisbest [02:06]**

dahyun already said 1 day

**stfu.yoongi [02:06]**

ok then 1 day and 2 seconds

**jinisbest [02:07]**

ok cool

ok let me get this straight

dahyun- 1 day

sana- 4 days

tzuyu- 2 days

tae- 3 days

jeongyeon- when they wake up

namjoon- 8 hours

mina- 5 min after they wake up

hobi- 5 days

jimin- irrelevant

nayeon- a week

chae- 10 days

yoongi- 1 day and 2 sec

me- tmr at dinner

correct?

**dubu? [02:07]**

yup

**jinisbest [02:07]**

ok see you in the morning

**stfu.yoongi [02:07]**

finally

* * *

**gay beans and shit**

**_ggukkie__ is typing...**

**ggukie_ [16:32]**

i cant do this anymore

**dancingmomo [16:32]**

same

i

crave

meat

**stfu.yoongi [16:32]**

i win

suck it

**ggukie_ [16:32]**

what?

wdym???

**jinisbest [16:32]**

we all placed bets on how long you two could go vegetarian

and yoongi won

somehow

**dancingmomo [16:32]**

wait

how much did you each bet??

**nabongs [16:33]**

25.000 won each

and i was nice enough to give you two a week >:(

**tigerrawr [16:33]**

i gave them 10 fucking days

and you let me down

**ggukie_ [16:33]**

so yoongi just won 350.000 won?

**stfu.yoongi [16:33]**

yes and im gonna spend it all on music shit

**dancingmomo [16:33]**

jimin,

did you bet as well??

**chimin [16:33]**

of course not!!

i love you both too much

**ggukkie_ [16:33]**

aw <33

**dancingmomo [16:34]**

:c heartu

**jeongyeon:) [16:34]**

ew

how? do? you? stand? him? hes? annoying???

**chimin [16:34]**

shut the fcuk up

**jeongyeon:) [16:34]**

idiot

**godjihyoyourass [16:34]**

how many times a day do i have to constantly scold you two?? when youre both younger than me??

what??

**chimin [16:34]**

sorry

**jeongyeon:) [16:34]**

sorry

**jinisbest [16:34]**

can someone help me

**honeypunchsana [16:34]**

what?

**jinisbest [16:35]**

namjoon and dahyun are um...

about to murder each other???

i dont know exactly why???

**dubu? [16:35]**

its cause he thinks hes a better dancer than ME

**crabcatcher [16:35]**

i'll fucking prove it to you 

get your scrawny ass down here at the practice room ready to be beaten

**ohnomina! [16:35]**

***proved wrong

**stfu.yoongi [16:35]**

**👍👍**

**ggukkie_ [16:36]**

um

ok

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i didn't intend for nayeon and chae to be kind of ghost characters in this chapter. it jsut sorta happened haha. buuuuuuut  
> the next chapter will be focusing on them both to make up for my idiot self lmao


	4. dine & dash on your ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which the gang gotta dash on out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao this chapter was insipired by that one episode in that 70s show iykyk

**gay beans and shit**

_**nabongs is typing...** _

**nabongs [19:32]**

so like im getting kinda hangry

I haven't eaten all day

fEEd mE

**jinisbest [19:32]**

why haven't you eaten anything???

**chimin [19:32]**

yeah you should eat

:c

**nabongs [19:33]**

its called fasting

oh and also I was busy trying to beat kook at overwatch

**ggukkie_ [19:33]**

yeah and she so lost

lmao it was so easy it wasn't even fun

**nabongs [19:33]**

shut up

**jeongyeon:) [19:33]**

we'll go in a bit

sana is putting on her makeup and dahyun is showering

so soon

**nabongs [19:33]**

ugh

im hungry

**stfu.yoongi [19:33]**

if you're hungry, eat an apple

**godjihyoyourass [19:33]**

you should really say that to taehyung

all he's been eating recently is instant noodles and mcdonalds

**taebear [19:34]**

um that is not true

I've also been eating lucky charms? and popsicles!

**godjihyoyourass [19:34]**

like thats any better🙄

**nabongs [19:34]**

i am cutting up an apple rn for you tae

eat it or else i will shove it down your throat.

**taebear [19:34]**

damn

fine

**crabcatcher [19:34]**

you guys!!!

i found this beautiful crab!!

**dubu? [19:35]**

why are you at the beach?

we're going out to dinner like in 10 minutes.

**crabcatcher [19:35]**

don't you like my crab? 

:(

**honeypunchsana [19:35]**

i do!!!

**nabongs [19:35]**

it is really cute lol

**chimin [19:36]**

its tiny~

**jeongyeon:) [19:36]**

like you.

**chimin [19:36]**

excuse me but i like my height

**dancingmomo [19:36]**

but just the other day you were complaining about how even when you wear shoes with heels, jeongguk's still 

taller than you

**chimin [19:36]**

yes but now i've grown to it

**dancingmomo [19:36]**

oh

**nabongs [19:37]**

k taehyung ate his apple lets go

**dubu? [19:37]**

namjoons at the beach

**jinisbest [19:37]**

yeah and so am i

we'll meet you there

**stfu.yoongi [19:37]**

wait 

where are we going again

**ggukkie_ [19:37]**

some ramen thing

or sushi

wait where?

**crabcatcher [19:37]**

if sushi's involved, leave me

**tigerrawr [19:38]**

idiots we're going to bbq

**ohnomina! [19:38]**

ok can we go now?? 

me and nayeon are waiting for you guys in the car

**nabongs [19:38]**

yeah

oh and hobi and taehyung are paying bc they got that bonus for some shit

what was it?

**taebear [19:38]**

because we are too handsome

**hobihobihope! [19:38]**

yes

**jinisbest [19:38]**

lmfao yeah right

**stfu.yoongi [19:38]**

alright lego

**ggukkie_[19:39]**

right!

:D

* * *

_many, many, many stupid ass arguements and screams later..._

* * *

**nabongs [21:09]**

ok tae

hobi

pay the damn bill

**hobihobihope! [21:09]**

why are you texting me when im sitting right across from you?

**ohnomina! [21:09]**

because she doesn't want to yell

**nabongs [21:09]**

yup.

**stfu.yoongi [21:09]**

pay the bill idiots

**taebear [21:10]**

we cant.

**nabongs [21:10]**

what

**chimin [21:10]**

what do you mean you cant?

**hobihobihope! [21:10]**

we mean we cant pay for dinner

**jinisbest [21:10]**

what.

i-

**godjihyoyourass [21:11]**

waitwaitwait

none of us brought our wallets because SOMEONE was SUPPOSED to PAY THE BILL

**nabongs [21:11]**

y'all are goners ☠️

**stfu.yoongi [21:11]**

i say lets kill them

**taebear [21:11]**

WHAT THE HELL YOONGI?!

**hobihobihope! [21:11]**

he lost his soul a long time ago tae

**godjihyoyourass [21:11]**

we're not gonna kill you

**taebear [21:11]**

:)

**godjihyoyourass [21:12]**

yet.

**ggukkie_ [21:12]**

LMAO-

**honeypunchsana [21:12]**

oop kook just fell off his chair

**nabongs [21:12]**

yeah we can see that sana

**dancingmomo [21:12]**

i'll pay the bill

**chimin [21:12]**

NO!

**jeongyeon:) [21:12]**

ew 

tiny man spoke

**chimin [21:12]**

why dont you say that to my fucking face?

**dancingmomo [21:12]**

gasp

**dubu? [21:13]**

this is a holy group chat????

we do not cuss in front of the lord?????

**crabcatcher [21:13]**

lmao get your facts right

**nabongs [21:13]**

joons right

this chat is flithy like poo

**dubu? [21:13]**

you wanna die 75 years earlier? 😡

**crabcatcher [21:13]**

lets take this outside, tiny woman

**stfu.yoongi [21:13]**

stfu.

please, tae, hobi

PAY THE DAMN BILL

**taebear [21:13]**

love me :c

**ohnomina! [21:14]**

damn thats gay

**tigerrawr [21:14]**

very

**ggukkie_ [21:14]**

um excuse me??

you two are super duper gay for each other

**nabongs [21:14]**

woah there buckeroo

**godjihyoyourass [21:14]**

yeah um

thats not true???

**jinisbest [21:14]**

can we please go back to hobi and tae??

**chimin [21:14]**

pay it

pay it

pay it

pay it

**jeongyeon:) [21:14]**

shut up

**chimin [21:14]**

**jeongyeon:) [21:14]**

that meme is dead

**chimin [21:14]**

i dont care :3

**hobihobihope! [21:14]**

i dont have my wallet

**nabongs [21:14]**

why not you dummy?

**hobihobihope! [21:14]**

ouch :c

i left it at home

**taebear [21:14]**

omg same

**ohnomina! [21:14]**

"oMg!1!!'"

**godjihyoyourass [21:15]**

go get it then??

**stfu.yoongi [21:15]**

wait

* * *

**stfu.yoongi [21:15]**

they're lying

**godjihyoyourass [21:15]**

what?

**tigerrawr [21:15]**

i dont think they are

**stfu.yoongi [21:15]**

well thats caue your brain is non exsistent

**ohnomina! [21:15]**

hey

**ggukkie_ [21:15]**

see???!!!!

**ohnomina! [21:15]**

shut up

**jinisbest [21:15]**

wait that actually makes sense

**stfu.yoongi [21:16]**

right?  
they convienently left their wallets at home

**jinisbest [21:16]**

and they want the car keys

YES

**dubu? [21:16]**

hobi's asking for them right now

**honeypunchsana [21:16]**

guys i dont like this :c

**dancingmomo [21:16]**

me too :((

just give them the keys

**honeypunchsana [21:16]**

yea :3

**chimin [21:16]**

we cant though

they're tricking us

**ggukkie_ [21:16]**

dahyun

did you give hobi the keys?

**dubu? [21:16]**

hell no!

i dont even have them

**stfu.yoongi [21:17]**

then who does?

**ggukkie_ [21:17]**

i thought dahyun had them

**dubu? [21:17]**

didn't nayeon have them?

**nabongs [21:17]**

i gave them to mina when we walked in

**ohnomina! [21:17]**

and i gave them to chae

**ggukkie_ [21:17]**

thought so

**tigerrawr [21:17]**

youre one breath away from getting your ass kicked

but i gave them to momo

**stfu.yoongi [21:17]**

oh fuck

**chimin [21:17]**

momo~~~~

**dancingmomo [21:17]**

yes~~

**chimin [21:18]**

do you have the car keys?

**dancingmomo [21:18]**

not anymore

* * *

**nabongs [21:18]**

hobi where the fuck are you and tae

**hobihobihope! [21:18]**

were going to pick up our wallets 

jeez

**taebear [21:18]**

trust us :)

**chimin [21:18]**

dont listen to him

shouldve known that 8 years ago

**taebear [21:18]**

**😈**

**jinisbest [21:19]**

momo this is all your fault

**dancingmomo [21:19]**

hey!!

it isnt. i didnt know~

**crabcatcher [21:19]**

lets just wait it out

we only live 10 minutes away from here

**nabongs [21:19]**

ok give them 20 minutes

**hobihobihope! [21:19]**

we will be back

* * *

_20 minutes later..._

* * *

**stfu.yoongi [21:39]**

told you

**dancingmomo [21:40]**

fine

i'll go and get them

**chimin [21:40]**

im going with you

i dont want you getting stolen

**godjihyoyourass [21:40]**

you guys are just gonna go home too, huh?

**chimin [21:40]**

please

we are not immature like those idiots

* * *

_some time later..._

* * *

**ggukkie_ [21:59]**

they are immature like those idiots!!

**jeongyeon:) [21:59]**

told you

**stfu.yoongi [22:00]**

you didn't say shit.

**jinisbest [22:00]**

now,

idk about yall,

but im getting tempted to just run out of here

**dubu? [22:00]**

honestly same

**honeypunchsana [22:00]**

what?

**nabongs [22:00]**

me too

can we just leave??

**jeongyeon:) [22:01]**

dude youre idols

uh no?

**dubu? [22:01]**

come on, jeongs

this thing is gonna go on all night

mind as well leave now

**jeongyeon:) [22:01]**

youre right...

**stfu.yoongi [22:01]**

wtf

**godjihyoyourass [22:01]**

nO! 

you guys are not dining and dashing!!

**honeypunchsana [22:02]**

dont make me throw some fists

**nabongs [22:02]**

tiny hand c:

**ohnomina! [22:02]**

you guys are dumb

leave then

**godjihyoyourass [22:02]**

wha-

**jinisbest [22:03]**

thank you

**nabongs [22:03]**

bye bye!!

**stfu.yoongi [22:03]**

lmao idc

bye idiots

**godjihyoyourass [22:03]**

you guys should really have my back more often ya know

**ggukkie_ [22:03]**

id rather not

**godjihyoyourass [22:03]**

i hate you

**ggukkie_ [22:03]**

**😘**

**crabcatcher [22:04]**

what do we do now?

**tigerrawr [22:04]**

im lost

whats happening

whos paying

help

**ohnomina! [22:04]**

idk either lol

jihyo~~~

**godjihyoyourass [22:04]**

none of us brought our wallets

**stfu.yoongi [22:04]**

cause of stupid asses, taehyung and hoseok

😒

**godjihyoyourass [22:04]**

no

**tigerrawr [22:04]**

we shouldve just left with seokjin

**ggukiee_ [22:05]**

honestly.....

**crabcatcher [22:05]**

ok um

no?

we are gonna pay somehow

**stfu.yoongi [22:05]**

um sorry namjoon but we cant?

we literally have nothing on us rn

**honeypunchsana [22:05]**

why not paying them with a picture or like an autograph?

**ohnomina! [22:05]**

thats lowkey dumb

but it might work?

**godjihyoyourass [22:05]**

but thats like hella sketch

**crabcatcher [22:05]**

i know

we'd have to ask,

"excuse me, i have no credit, debit, or cash on me to pay for my meal. can i pay for it with a picture?"

um

no

**ggukkie_ [22:05]**

hyungs right

we cant do that.

but dining and dashing is also risky

**tigerrawr [22:06]**

damnnn itttt

tf do we do

**stfu.yoongi [22:06]**

lets just do it

**godjihyoyourass [22:06]**

what

**honeypunchsana [22:06]**

nonono!

thats scaryyy~~~

**stfu.yoongi [22:06]**

nono, i have a plan

who wants to be the bait

**ggukkie_ [22:06]**

me

i love a little freaky in my life

**ohnomina! [22:06]**

gross

**stfu.yoongi [22:06]**

wasn't expecting that.

ok then. kook you'll distract the workers by taking a photo with them

**ggukkie_ [22:07]**

ok!

**stfu.yoongi [22:07]**

i'll stay and wait for you by the door and the rest of you run out

**tigerrawr [22:07]**

yeppers

**ohnomina! [22:07]**

what did i tell you about saying yeppers?

**tigerrawr [22:07]**

sorry

**ggukkie_ [22:07]**

simp

**crabcatcher [22:07]**

harhar

**stfu.yoongi [22:08]**

ew.

ok kook then after you get the photo we run out the resturant and book it back home

**ggukkie_ [22:08]**

ok im ready.

**honeypunchsana [22:08]**

i dont know guys~

im scared

**godjihyoyourass [22:08]**

ill give you a piggy back ride back home

**honeypunchsana [22:08]**

ok!

**stfu.yoongi [22:08]**

yesyou guys ready?

**ohnomina! [22:08]**

yes

**tigerrawr [22:08]**

yes

**honeypunchsana [22:08]**

yes

**godjihyoyourass [22:08]**

yes

**crabcatcher [22:08]**

yes

**ggukkie_ [22:09]**

i was fucking born ready

**ohnomina! [22:09]**

damn

**stfu.yoongi [22:09]**

ok go

* * *

_some running and potential termanation later.._

* * *

**taebear [23:14]**

damn you guys did it

**hobihobihope! [23:14]**

took you long enough

**chimin [23:14]**

right?

**ohnomina! [23:14]**

shut up

next time, you guys are paying dinner for real

**taebear [23:14]**

lol no

* * *

**yoda [23:16]**

good job

**taebear [23:16]**

thank you

**hobihobihope! [23:16]**

thank you

**taebear [23:17]**

now can you tell us

why you had to get revenge on them?

**hobihobihope! [23:17]**

pleeaaasee~?

.

.

.

**yoda [23:20]**

they stole my chipz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oml so sorry for not posting ack-  
> um so tzuyu just needed to get revenge on the others cause they stole her chipz
> 
> ok so stream gods menu  
> stream more and more  
> stream stay gold+ your eyes tell  
> stream dynamite (tbd)
> 
> love you uwu💜💜💜


	5. the stolen diary pt.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which someone steals koos diary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i changed the format a bit lol  
> again
> 
> enjoy

** gay beans and shit **

_**nabongs** _ **removed _ggukkie__**

**_nabongs_ is typing**

**nabongs**

hold on!

dont add him me and jimin found something ~spicy~

**taebear**

woman you of all people should know that i cant eat spicy things

**nabongs**

no u idiot we found something ~spicy~

**hobihobihope!**

ooh~ 

what?

**stfu.yoongi**

this has to do with something with kook?

**chimin**

yes

**jinisbest**

excuse me

but jeon jeonggukie is an innocent bean

how dare you two go through his stuff without consent?

scoff

**nabongs**

we found his diary.

**ohnomina!**

what.

**jeongyeon**

this is the only time im ever going to say this but good job jimin

**chimin**

ew i h8 u

**jeongyeon**

wow the one time i try to be nice and this is what i get

**chimin**

yes

**jeongyeon**

go die

**nabongs**

AHEM

koo's diary?

**honeypunchsana**

how did you guys even find it?

**chimin**

he left it out on his bed

so we took it

**godjihyoyourass**

thats not nice

**nabongs**

yeah but who cares its jeongguk

**jinisbest**

i do!

**chimin**

i do too but i play dirty ;)

**ohnomina!**

*gags*

**stfu.yoongi**

right on

**hobihobihope!**

readd it!!

**taebear**

wait did he decorate the cover all cute?

**chimin**

****

**taebear**

oh my god hes adorable he spelled his name wrong i-

**dancingmomo**

aww a backwards e :(

**tigerrawr**

please read it nothing interesting has happened except when tzu pranked tae and gave him

level 10 spicy curry. 

**yoda**

oh yeah lol i forgot about that.

**taebear**

how dare you treat me like this? when i give all my love to you?

**chimin**

😭🖤💔

bye im gonna go cry

**nabongs**

omg shut up read the fuckvingr diary

**dubu?**

damn someones pmsing👀

**nabongs**

i- 

what-

**yoda**

pfft no nayeon is just always evil

**tigerrawr**

yes ma'am

**chimin**

alright alright here's the first entry

"today was the best day ever. I spent it with yoongi and oh,

he's so beautiful. I just wanted to kiss his lips and make love

to him all night. His creamy, porcelain skin. His shimmering

eyes. His fluffy, soft black locks. He's just perfect."

y'all dont know how much i'm hurt.

**stfu.yoongi**

wait what

**honeypunchsana**

OMG JEONGGUK LIKES YOONGI!??

**crabcatcher**

um what's happening

**ohnomina!**

jeongguk wants to fuck yoongi and not jimin

**crabcatcher**

wow ok

i thought that jimin and kook were like a thing?

**yoda**

lmao not anymore

**dubu?**

namjoon was that you in the shower singing jeongyeon's

high note from one in a million?

**crabcatcher**

uh

noo..

**dubu?**

stupid ofc it was you!!

my eardrums were violated

**stfu.yoongi**

can someone please tell me if jeongguk REALLY

wants to fuck me?

**nabongs**

lol right the diary

read another entry

**chimin**

okay this one was written 2 weeks ago

"today sucked. nayeon SOMEHOW beat me at overwatch

and wouldn't stop bragging about it. But when jimin

came in and just cuddled with me, I was fine. Tbh, I 

don't know who I like anymore. Jimin, Yoongi. Jimin,

Yoongi. It's like ping-pong inside my head. Ugh."

ok what.

**nabongs**

i think we need to remember that I beat kook

at overwatch and Im very proud.

**jeongyeon**

SUCKS TO BE YOU

YOUR BOYFRIEND DOESN'T LOVE YOU NO MORE~~

**chimin**

i fucking hate you

**dancingmomo**

so jeongguk likes both yoongi and jimin?

why?

**yoda**

because jimin is a soft cuddle bug 

**chimin**

aw :)

**yoda**

or a ginormous bitch

**chimin**

wow

**yoda**

and yoongi intimidating but like the softest one here

**tigerrawr**

that is quite the literal truth

**godjihyoyourass**

Um

Jeongguk's looking for his diary

oh fuck

**nabongs**

shit give it back!

**chimin**

tf?

NO!!

im not giving it DIRECTLY back to him

**dubu?**

idiot she means just put it in his room!

**godjihyoyourass**

No dont!

He's going up to his room

**stfu.yoongi**

yall are fucked.

**honeypunchsana**

hell yeah

**hobihobihope!**

SANA!

**honeypunchsana**

nuh uh

**chimin**

wait.

**honeypunchsana**

jeon to the fucking gguk.

**chimin**

SHIT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this during class llololololooll  
> importing the photo took forever??? why??????
> 
> happy birthday jisunggieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee i might not be able to make a short fic cause im a procrastinator but maybe ;)


	6. the stolen diary pt.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which jimin gets his ass kicked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone!! if you have any requests or ideas for some chapters, feel free to comment down below your request! I am slowly running out of ideas but my mind is a unique one so that wont happen lol. again, i am taking requests for this fic! 
> 
> thank you <3333333333333333333333

**gay beans and shit**

_**nabongs** _ **has left the chat**

 _**chimin** _ **has left the chat**

**honeypunchsana [15:09]**

oh hell no

 _**honeypunchsana** _ **added _nabongs_ to the chat**

 _**honeypunchsana** _ **added _chimin_ to the chat**

**dubu? [15:09]**

yooooo im so excited

**yoda [15:10]**

for what?

**dubu? [15:10]**

them bitches finna gonna get it

**crabcatcher [15:10]**

youre so weird

**dubu? [15:10]**

no one cares

**honeypunchsana [15:10]**

shut the fuck up uglies

**jinisbest [15:10]**

who you calling ugly!?

**godjihyoyourass [15:11]**

what the fuck was that huge thud?

**stfu.yoongi [15:11]**

HOLY sHIT BHAAhaahA!

YO JIMIN JUST FUCKING ATE IT OML

**dancingmomo [15:11]**

what!?

:(

**taebear [15:11]**

if anyone is allowed to make jimin fall, its me.

jeon fucking gguk get your dumbass down here

**nabongs [15:11]**

omgogmgomgomgogmgogmogm

imsoscaredimsoscaredomgomgomg

**ohnomina! [15:12]**

what?

where are you?

**nabongs [15:12]**

im in a closet i think idk i just ran in the closest room

omgomgogmgom theres footsteps holyfuckfofsonw

**tigerrawr [15:12]**

damn

never in my life would i have thought that kook would tear you assholes to shreds

i like it :)

**yoda [15:12]**

same

**hobihobihope! [15:12]**

you sadistic bastards

nayeon, honey im coming to save you

**dancingmomo [15:12]**

save daddy too!!

**taebear [15:12]**

ummm.....

momo dont ever say that again

**dancingmomo [15:12]**

why?

**stfu.yoongi [15:13]**

its a term you use for the dom in sex

**ohnomina! [15:13]**

YOONGI!!!!

**stfu.yoongi [15:13]**

what? 

youre like the same as me?

**ohnomina! [15:13]**

momo is an innocent bean

**dancingmomo [15:13]**

bean!

**hobihobihope! [15:13]**

omg my heart is uwuing

**nabongs [15:13]**

shitshitshitshitshit

fuck he's coming back

MINA FUCKING HELP ME

**ohnomina! [15:14]**

IM TRYING

**godjihyoyourass [15:14]**

thats a lie.

**ohnomina! [15:14]**

goddamit jihyo

nayeon open the fucking door im right outside

**nabongs [15:14]**

i didnt hear anything

are you TRICKiNG me????

**ohnomina! [15:14]**

no you idiot i can hear your breathing

**nabongs [15:14]**

oh ok

open sesame

**ohnomina! [15:14]**

what?

nayeon where tf are you?

**dubu? [15:14]**

what happened

**hobihobihope! [15:15]**

what the fuck was that

 **crabcatcher** **[15:15]**

WHO SCREAMED

**tigerrawr [15:15]**

that was like a scream of bloody murder

**stfu.yoongi [15:15]**

this isn't funny anymore

**godjihyoyourass [15:15]**

IT NEVER WAS FUNNY

MOMO IS SHAKING FOR GODS SAKE

**stfu.yoongi [15:15]**

alright damn

jin go get the microwave

**jinisbest [15:15]**

um why?

**stfu.yoongi [15:15]**

jeongguk's scared of them so go unplug it and plug it back in the hallway

and like turn it on for like 3 seconds so that it can beep 

**jinisbest [15:15]**

lmao ok

**jinisbest [15:15]**

it beeped but i dont think jk is here

welp

**crabcatcher [15:15]**

where's jeongyeon?

she hasn't talked the entire day

**tigerrawr [15:16]**

oh god you dont think...

**yoda [15:16]**

yup

she's definitely beating up jimin

**hobihobihope! [15:16]**

THERE GOES ANOTHER SCREAM

MOMO IS SHAKING OMG MY HEART

**ohnomina! [15:16]**

comfort her you idiot!

**hobihobihope! [15:16]**

WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM DOING!?!?

**crabcatcher [15:16]**

calm down guys

**dubu? [15:16]**

no

**crabcatcher [15:16]**

fuck you

**dubu? [15:16]**

:)

**godjihyoyourass [15:16]**

guyguysguys

shut up

**yoda [15:17]**

no

tell me where jeongyeon is so i can watch her beat up chimin

**hobihobihope! [15:17]**

im scareddeedede :((((((

**taebear [15:17]**

me too! 

protect my beautiful hirai momo

**hobihobihope! [15:17]**

shut the fuck up shes mine

**nabongs [15:17]**

GUYS

ITS JIMIN

HOLY SHIT JEONGGUK IS FUCKING TERRIFYING

**dubu? [15:17]**

why aren't you using your phone?

**nabongs [15:17]**

jeongguk broke it

OMG NO ITS JEONGYEON

**crabcatcher [15:17]**

SHE'S THERE?!?

JIMIN WHAT IS HAPPENING

**godjihyoyourass [15:17]**

WE NEED TO STOP THIS

JIMIN WHERE ARE YOU

**nabongs [15:17]**

okay i got away

I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE I AM

I THINK IT'S SOME PLACE ABANDONED BUT IDKDKDDK

**yoda [15:18]**

oh you mean the old burger king down the street

mmmm i want burger king now

**dubu? [15:18]**

same sistaaaaa

**hobihobihope! [15:18]**

ooh! me too!

its momo!!

**dubu? [15:18]**

cmon sistaaaaaaa

**ohnomina! [15:18]**

a'ight im going to the burger king

who else?

**stfu.yoongi [15:18]**

i'll go im scary

**godjihyoyourass [15:18]**

im scared for my fucking life but ill go

**crabcatcher [15:18]**

same

**taebear [15:18]**

WELL ME, JIN, HOBI, AND SANA, ARE GONNA BINGE POKEMON HOES

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

**stfu.yoongi [15:18]**

ugh god.

* * *

alrighty.

so this part isn't texting FYI owo

The four walked up to the old, abandoned burger king establishment and creaked opened the door. Namjoon hid behind Yoongi who rolled his eyes.

"Seriously, dude? We creaked open a fucking door and you're already scared. Hobi's love for j-line is scarier than this." The older dramatically wiggled him off of his shoulder. Namjoon still clinged onto him, despite what the older said.

"Alright, everyone, shut up." Mina whispered, leading everyone into the building. Dusty tables were lined up on the perimeter of the place, along with some in the middle. The menus slightly glowed under the cobwebs and dust. "Mmm, Ima get me some whoppers." Mina said, patting her belly. 

"Lets check the back door." Jihyo pointed to the door with a sign saying 'Employees Only'. They nodded, following her lead. Namjoon exhaled deeply, letting go of Yoongi's arm. She slowly and carefully twisted open the doorknob, revealing the rusty kitchen. There were still dishes in the sink from years, and years ago. The smell overpowered Jihyo, making her gag. 

"Holy shit! It smells terrible!" She violently whispered. "Ew, ew, EW!!!" She shivered, seeing ugly spiders and tiny rodents. Mina rolled her eyes, groaning.

"Grow up. C'mon, the quicker we find them, the quicker I can get a whopper." Mina walked around the counters to the supply closet, which really wasn't a supply closet. "Woah...Check it out." She motioned with her hand. The others immediately scurried over, looking at the tiny trap door under the racks of moldy food.

"Disgusting." Jihyo mumbled, pinching her nose. Yoongi knelt down, opening up the tiny door. A tall ladder fell down creakily. Yoongi averted his attention to Mina, who seemed excited about this. Then to Jihyo and Namjoon, who acted like death was a better option.

"Idiots. Im going first." Yoongi scooted down and gripped onto the ladder, each step creaking loudly. Mina went next when Yoongi was around halfway. Namjoon and Jihyo looked at each other with wide eyes, wanting the other to go first. Namjoon gave in and whimpered each time he took a step. Jihyo chuckled silently, copying him exactly. 

Yoongi and Mina wandered around the underground hideout, inspecting every nook and cranny. Jihyo and Namjoon clinged onto each other like koalas, taking teeny steps. "Guys! Look what I found." Yoongi cracked open a wooden door, peeking inside. He gasped, finding Jimin laying on the ground. 

"Jesus Christ, are they okay?" Mina worriedly said, running to him. Mina shook Jimin's shoulder lightly. "Hey, wake up. Its Mina." Her voice barely above a whisper. Jimin let out a soft groan, turning his body around and slowly opening his eyes. 

"Wha...Mina?" He weakly said, rubbing his eyes and sitting up straight. She slithly smiled, her hand still on his shoulder. Jimin looked around and met eye contact with the 3 others. "What- You guys need to go. Jeongguk is somewhere here, it isn't safe." Jimin panicked, standing up and trying to escort them out the building. 

"Jimin, we're here to take you and Nayeon home. Speaking of which, where is Nayeon?" Jihyo tip toed over to the narrow hallway located at the back of the room. Nothing. 

"She's still at home, with Jeongyeon." Jimin shivered at the name. Jihyo sighed, tip toeing back to the group. "C-Can we go already? I'm fucking traumatized." Jimin held onto Namjoon's hand for comfort. Yoongi nodded, leading everyone back out the door. 

"Yeah. Jeongguk doesn't seem to be anywhere here." Mina nonchalantly said, when suddenly the ladder fell down and a figure came creaking down it. "Uh oh.." She muttered. 

"Uh Oh is fucking right." Jeongguk said, holding what looks to be a diary. "Where do you think you're taking Jimin?" Jeongguk pointed at the small boy, who was shaking and hiding behind Namjoon.

"Uh...Home? You're like, abusing them and we gotta go get Nayeon unless Hobi already saved her." Yoongi said in a relaxed tone. Namjoon nodded, holding Jimin tighter. 

"Nayeon? Oh, Jeongyeon has her. Let me just warn you, its brutal." Jeongguk crossed his arms, the diary still in his hand. 

"You're really upset about her and Jimin finding your diary, huh? You're a baby, Kook." Mina scoffed.

"I-I'm not! Ask Nayeon! Ask Jimin! I'm NOT a BABY!!" Jeongguk exclaimed, throwing his diary at full force, slamming against the farthest wall. Namjoon ducked Jimin and Jihyo down, making sure that they weren't going to get hurt. "I hate being called a stupid ass baby." He pouted, squating down and hugging his legs, burying hsi face into his knees. He cried softly.

The 5 instantly felt guilt. "Jeongguk...I'm sorry." Jimin knelt down to his height, hugging the younger boy. "Me and Nayeon didn't want to hurt you or make you feel bad. We we're just...acting immature and I'm sorry again." The older rubbed Jeongguk's back, calming him down. 

"R-Really?" Jeongguk peeked out at Jimin with his tear filled eyes. 

"Of course. But, you shouldn't take your anger out on us or on anyone else. It could be dangerous, like today." Jimin muttered to him and Jeongguk towards the end. However, Jihyo has the ears of a wolf. 

"Wait, what? What was dangerous about today? What did Jeongguk do?" She stepped forward, pushing the others away from her. Namjoon scoffed, folding his arms and wanting to leave the creepy place.

"Nothing, Jihyo. He just got a little violent, thats all." Jimin shrugged, continuing to comfort the boy. Jeongguk began to sob louder once he heard Jihyo gasp.

"How?! No one should hurt anyone! AT ALL!!" She shouted, stepping a few steps back. Jimin shushed her, hugging Jeongguk tighter than before. His loud sobs filled the echoey room. "Sorry, but don't fucking hurt anyone ever again, Jeongguk. You hear me?" She raised her voice. A weak 'Yes' was heard from the younger. She hummed, walking out the door.

"C'mon. Let's go get Nayeon." She said, not looking back. Jimin helped Jeongguk up and back hugged him out the door. He cried softly, but the touch from Jimin generally makes him feel better. The rest stayed quiet, observing the couple. 

"Thats sweet." Mina mumbled to herself, smiling softly. Yoongi overheard her and chuckled quietly to himself. 

"I know, right?" He mumbled, walking ahead of her and catching up to Jihyo. Mina's eyes instantly widened, embarrased that Yoongi heard her. She smiled, looking down at her feet. 

"You and him are the same person. You'd make a nice couple." Namjoon spoke, meeting eyes with the younger. He did some finger guns and gave her a final wink before scurring off to Jihyo and Yoongi. Mina giggled, shaking her head lightly.

_Maybe...We would make a good couple._

* * *

"JEONGYEOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!" Yoongi yelled, startling the family chilling in the living room. "Whoops, sorry. Wheres Jeongyeon?" Yoongi locked the door, walking to the living room.

"Dont know, dont care." Seokjin stuffed a million pieces of popcorn in his mouth.

"Didn't ask you, bitch." Yoongi snapped. Seokjin scoffed, ignoring the younger. "Jeongguk, wheres Jeongyeon?" 

"Um..shes in the bunker, I believe." Jimin released his hold from Jeongguk and held his hand instead. 

"And where is that?" Jihyo looked up at the couple. 

"In my room, inside of my closet."

"Since when did we have a bunker?" Namjoon held his hand out in a confused manner.

"Since two months ago." Jeongguk pressed his lips together. Namjoon let out a long 'Oh', making Jeongguk chuckle. He took the lead and guided the 4 to his bedroom. "Dont make fun of me. Im looking at Mina and Jihyo." Jeongguk glared at the two girls before twisting open his door. The 6 stepped inside and found a couple anime posters, some ramen packages, and a giant carrot plush on his bed.

"Oh my god I want this." Jihyo ran to the carrot plush, hugging it tightly. "Its sooooooo cute!!" She squealed, placing it down and walking over to his closet. Jeongguk slid the closet door open, revealing loads of black clothing.

"E-boy." Mina mumbled. Jeongguk giggled cutely which obviously made Jimin coo. He pushed away the clothing and squatted down to open the trap door. Instead of a creaky and unstable ladder, it was a pole like what firefighters use. 

"Its a tiny room. 500 square feet in total." Jeongguk looked down into the dark bunker. 

"Is that including other rooms as well?" Yoongi folded his arms, shifting his weight to one leg. 

Jeongguk shook his head. "There's only three rooms and they're pretty narrow too." Jeongguk said before sliding down the pole unexpectedly. Jimin clapped, excited to go next.

"Whoa!! Im next!" Jimin jumped with joy before wrapping his tiny hand around the pole and sliding down. He giggled and hopped off at the end, grabbing hold of Jeongguk's hand. Yoongi went third, followed by Namjoon who also hopped down at the end. Mina and Jihyo stared into each others souls, offering the other to go first.

"Guys~ C'mon! Its fun!" Jimin shouted from underground. Jihyo let out and awkward laugh, shaking her head quickly. 

"No thanks~! We'll stay up here! You guys go on without us!" She gave them two thumbs up and hurriedly closed the door. You could hear their fast paced footsteps from underneath. 

"Whatever. Lets just hurry up." Namjoon walked over to one of three narrow doors, opening it and finding nothing but shelves with a billion ramens and a stove top with 5 jus of water to boil the ramen. There was even moldy and shrived green onion on the shelves. "Okay then." Namjoon mumbled to himself. 

Yoongi sighed, walking to the second door. Jeongguk and Jimin skipped on over to the final door and opened the door simultaneously with Yoongi. Yoongi got nothing but an ugly toilet and shower. 

Jimin gasped. "Nayeon!" Him and Jeongguk ran over to Nayeon, who was laying on the cold floor. Namjoon and Yoongi raced over as well. "Is she okay?" Jimin worriedly asked.

Jeongguk felt her pulse. "She's breathing. Wheres Jeong-" He was suddenly cut off when a door swung open from inside the room. Out came Jeongyeon, her eyes filled with nothing but black. 

"Jeongguk, I though you said there was only three rooms!" Jimin whispered, inching back while holding onto Nayeon.

"Jeongyeon must've added this.." Jeongguk whispered back, hitting the wall. 

"What do you think you're doing?" Jeongyeon slowly walked to Jimin. Nothing but whimpers came out of his mouth. Jeongyeon evilily chuckled, making the entire situation scarier than it has to be. 

"What'd you do to her." Yoongi spoke from behind the three. He walked in front of Jeongyeon, his arms folded. 

"Nothing~. All i did was feed her persimmons. She fainted, dont know why. I love me some persimmons." She shrugged. Yoongi hummed, glancing at both Nayeon and Jeongyeon.

"You know she doesn't like persimmons." He growled, picking up Nayeon bridal style. since Yoongi is scrawny and tiny, she almost made him tip over before Namjoon could catch the two of them. He took Nayeon instead and waited at the pole.

"Why are you helping Jeongguk? Are you mad at us too?" Jimin asked nervously. 

Jeongyeon crossed her arms. "Just wanted to feed her persimmons, okay? Also, Im just generally made at you." She pressed her lips together. Jimin let out a tiny 'oh' and walked away to join the others. 

Why did it make Jeongyeon suddenly feel guilty?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mingi + Jeongmin?????????
> 
> yes uwu  
> i made this one with more suspense than i planned lol. hoped you enjoyed it idk its kinda weird lol.  
> im working on my jikook ff right now its just really long and with school i just-  
> it'll be out soon i promise i just wanted to update this fic so that it doesn't seem like im dead or whatever.
> 
> Any of you lovelies seen bts break the silence? I saw it on saturday at my local theater it was dope😌


	7. seokjinnie+chewy's spectacular dinner party!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jin + tzuyu + alcohol = absolute madness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi :3  
> chapter for the_great <3333
> 
> enjoy!

**gay beans and shit**

_**jinisbest** _ **changed the chat name to _seokjinnie's cooking show!_**

**yoda [16:23]**

hey :(

what about me?

**jinisbest [16:23]**

omg sorry love i love you so much holy shit sorry i love you

**ohnomina! [16:23]**

ew

**jinisbest [16:24]**

fucking die

 _**jinisbest** _ **changed the chat name to _jintzu's cooking show!!!_**

**yoda [16:24]**

yayyy!!!

**jeongyeon:) [16:24]**

wdym cooking show y'all starting some cutthroat kitchen shit?

**dubu? [16:24]**

if thats a thing then count me the fuck in

i wanna show egg namjoon who's boss.

**crabcatcher [16:24]**

excuse fucking me?

i have more knowledge than your numbskull corn kernel sized brain ugly🖕

**dubu? [16:24]**

i hope your brain explodes 🤪🤪🤯🤯

**crabcatcher [16:24]**

at least i'm not the size of a fucking piece of dust

**tigerrawr [16:24]**

LMAO

dahyun's size makes her cute :')

**jinisbest [16:25]**

CAN WE GET BACK ON TRACK I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!!

**chimin [16:25]**

yes beautiful amazing wonderful seokjinnie~?

**ggukkie_ [16:25]**

wow ok fine then this is over

**chimin [16:25]**

NO COME BACKKKKKKKK :(((

**dancingmomo [16:25]**

u succ pp

**chimin [16:25]**

momo :(( 

**yoda [16:25]**

jin just say it

**jinisbest [16:25]**

ok mate

everyone, me and tzu offcially decided that we're...

gonna have a dinner party!!!

**yoda [16:26]**

ah yeahhhh~~~!!!

**stfu.yoongi [16:26]**

but only jin can cook?

**yoda [16:26]**

i'm decorating the place and helping to make treats :3

**honeypunchsana [16:26]**

ooh! i wanna go!

**jinisbest [16:25]**

you're all invited just dont be gay

**hobihobihope! [16:26]**

that is somewhat impossible

**ohnomina! [16:26]**

ew why

**taebear [16:26]**

bc we're all gay

**stfu.yoongi [16:26]**

thaaaaaaaaaats a fucking lie :)

**jeongyeon:) [16:26]**

yeah wtf? 

you really think i wanna date dahyun?

**dubu? [16:26]**

ew no thank you

**jeongyeon:) [16:26]**

ik.

**crabcatcher [16:26]**

how am i gay?

y'all are gross

**jinisbest [16:26]**

thats not what you said in bed last night ;))

**stfu.yoongi [16:26]**

i want to commit not alive

**nabongs [16:26]**

mY ViRgIN EYeS!!

**dancingmomo [16:26]**

wheres the party gonna be at?

**jinisbest [16:27]**

jyp building

bighits an ass and ownt let me >:(

**dancingmomo [16:27]**

ok but where in the building?

**yoda [16:27]**

practice room

we gon' get lit mates

**jeongyeon:) [16:27]**

you do realize that youre an idol?

and you're the maknae?

**yoda [16:27]**

we gon' get lit mates

**jeongyeon:) [16:27]**

*sigh*

**ohnomina! [16:27]**

i don't feel like going.

**jinisbest [16:27]**

but whyyyy :(((((((

**ohnomina! [16:27]**

im very tired today idk.

**stfu.yoongi [16:27]**

same. 

**honeypunchsana [16:27]**

they're flirting!!!

**taebear [16:27]**

i simp ;))

**hobihobihope! [16:27]**

saME 

we need some mingi

**taebear [16:27]**

tf is that?

isn't yoona?

or like minga?

OOH MINGA!

**stfu.yoongi [16:27]**

and thats a combination of..??

**taebear [16:27]**

mina and suga?

duh.

**hobihobihope! [16:27]**

i still like mingi its cute :D

**ggukkie_ [16:27]**

aren't mina and chae dating? 

cuz they b gettin it, y'know?

**tigerrawr [16:27]**

um

no?

**ohnomina! [16:27]**

why do you always think me and chae are dating?

**ggukkie_ [16:27]**

admit it.

you two are gay for each other

**tigerrawr [16:28]**

NO!!

**ohnomina! [16:28]**

NOO!!!

**nabongs [16:28]**

that concludes that

im going to the party

i wanna get lit with chewy

**yoda [16:28]**

yes ma'am

**godjihyoyourass [16:28]**

i need to go.

**jinisbest [16:28]**

why?

no one wants you there

**godjihyoyourass [16:28]**

first of all,

you suck.

second,

i need to make sure tzuyu doesn't ACTUALLY get lit.

**yoda [16:28]**

i dont even know what it means

**dancingmomo [16:28]**

doesn't it mean to be lit like a light?

**chimin [16:28]**

no sweetie

**dancingmomo [16:28]**

get the fuck away from me traitor

**chimin [16:28]**

FINE THEN

**dubu? [16:28]**

i like this momo more.

**nabongs [16:28]**

same

**jinisbest [16:29]**

youre all going or die.

**taebear [16:29]**

fuck you you cant control me 

**nabongs [16:29]**

pft

**yoda [16:29]**

please come :(

it'd really mean a lot to me and seokjin

**hobihobihope! [16:29]**

my beautiful tzuyu~

**taebear [16:29]**

again with this shit?

DIDN'T I TELL YOU THAT SHE'S MINE BEFORE SHE'S YOURS??

**hobihobihope! [16:29]**

SHE LOVES ME MORE!!!

**taebear [16:29]**

NUH UH!!@!11!!@2132

**jeongyeon:) [16:29]**

ok guys she isn't property she's human

**yoda [16:29]**

besides, 

taehyungie is my father :)

**taebear [16:29]**

TOLD YOU!!

**hobihobihope! [16:30]**

no more chocolate milk for u >:(

**yoda [16:30]**

thats okay taehyung usually buys me cases once a week

**hobihobihope! [16:30]**

i hate my life

**jinisbest [16:30]**

is u idiots comin or knot?

cuz eye gotz lotz 2 doo man

**stfu.yoongi [16:30]**

please stop it hurts my retina 

**honeypunchsana [16:30]**

what?

whats that?

**ggukkie_ [16:30]**

its a part of your eye i think

**tigerrawr [16:30]**

i liek that word retina

call me retina now

im son retina

**stfu.yoongi [16:30]**

weirdo

**chimin [16:30]**

hyung were all going

go cook now

**jinisbest [16:30]**

i will cook like a crook who reads a book and took the hook to make a nook near the brook with the look of a gobbledygook

**crabcatcher [16:30]**

um

ok.

* * *

**ggukkie_ [21:33]**

why are taehyung a hobi like lowkey dancing like strippers??

**ohnomina! [21:33]**

its not lowkey

theyre literally griNDING EW!

**chimin [21:33]**

MOMO COVER YOUR PRETTY EYES!!

**dancingmomo [21:33]**

noe

u dont own me boy

but i will since im scared and uncomfortable.

**jinisbest [21:34]**

SOMEONE TURN OFF THIS SONG ITS ONLY MAKING THEM MORE TURNED ON!!

**honeypunchsana [21:34]**

what even is this song?

why are they saying its hot in here?

**nabongs [21:34]**

so take off all your clothes ;)

**godjihyoyourass [21:34]**

ew nayeon no

it's some ugly song about ugly things

nothing you need to know about sana <333

**honeypunchsana [21:34]**

okai

**dubu? [21:34]**

i am feeling so hot

iM gOnNa TaKe My ClOtHeS oFf!1!

**ohnomina! [21:34]**

oh god now nayeon and dahyun are dancing like weirdos

**stfu.yoongi [21:34]**

this is too gay for me

**ohnomina! [21:34]**

same can we go?

**ggukkie_ [21:34]**

so you two can do it?

**stfu.yoongi [21:34]**

STOP SHIPPING US

PLEASE

STOP

**ohnomina! [21:35]**

yes please

it'll never happen

**stfu.yoongi [21:35]**

right.

**godjihyoyourass [21:35]**

what the fuck are jimin and namjoon doing???

**jeongyeon:) [21:35]**

they got too high

**jinisbest [21:35]**

no theyre drunk

i dont have access to illegalness

**ggukkie_ [21:35]**

wow i forgave him and this is how he repays me?

**yoda [21:35]**

your boyfriends a man whore

**hobihobihope! [21:35]**

how do u turn off notifications?

**yoda [21:36]**

why text when we're right here?

**ggukkie_ [21:36]**

why are WE texting when we're right here?

**yoda [21:36]**

woah...

**honeypunchsana [21:36]**

its the little settings symbol and just click mute

**hobihobihope! [21:36]**

thank you, my love

**honeypunchsana [21:36]**

<333333333333333333333333

**tigerrawr [21:36]**

ok dinner was great but can we go?

this is...getting out of hand

**jeongyeon: [21:36]**

yeah now hobi, tae, ugly jimin, nayeon, dahyun, and namjoon are all dancing together.

**jinisbest [21:36]**

you liked my sashimi? 

yay thanks :D

**yoda [21:36]**

wait noo!!

i made some brownies!!

**tigerrawr [21:36]**

ooh nvm im staying

**jeongyeon:) [21:36]**

ok but please calm down the uglies over there

**godjihyoyourass [21:36]**

its too difficult

HWLP MWE!

**stfu.yoongi [21:36]**

fine

mina grab a leg

**ohnomina! [21:36]**

aight

**ggukkie_ [21:36]**

whyd you go straight to her?

YOONGI AND MINA = SUS!!

**stfu.yoongi [21:37]**

istfg im gonna murder you when youre sleeping. 

**ggukkie_ [21:37]**

youre not gonna be busy with mina?

**stfu.yoongi [21:37]**

JEONGGUK-

**jinisbest [21:37]**

CHILL THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE!!

TZUYU GET THE DAMN BROWNIES!

**yoda [21:37]**

OK!!

**godjihyoyourass [21:37]**

you guys are such idiots

**chimin [21:37]**

nosdwehakjarentsoidh

**dancingmomo [21:37]**

shut up and keep dancing idiot

**chimin [21:37]**

MO483MOIASMSORRY7PL%3sS!

**dancingmomo [21:37]**

I DONT FORGIVE YOU

**ohnomina! [21:37]**

damn

**stfu.yoongi [21:37]**

momo is just ruthless

**ggukkie_ [21:37]**

I CANTYYOYU TWEO NEED TO ADATE

**jinisbest [21:37]**

TYPE LIKE A NORMAL BEING IDIOT

**ggukkie_ [21:38]**

NEVERRRR

**yoda [21:38]**

brownies are here

**tigerrawr [21:38]**

MINE

**jeongyeon:) [21:38]**

MINEEEE

* * *

**jinisbest [21:58]**

tzuyu...

**yoda [21:58]**

yes?

**jinisbest [21:58]**

why did you stone them?

WHERE DID YOU GET THE ILLEGALNESS???

**yoda [21:58]**

stone them?

wdym?

**jinisbest [21:58]**

LIKE NOW EVERYONE IS FUCKING HIGH

WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE STUFFS??

TZUYUUUUUUU!!!!!!!

**yoda [21:58]**

wait istg i didn't get anything

JIN I SWEAR I DIDNT

I SWEAR ON MY LIFE I DIDN'T

**jinisbest [21:59]**

idk

seems like something you'd do

lmao its kinda funny

i guess momo, jk, and jimin made up

**yoda [21:59]**

clearly.

lmao look at dahyun and joon

THEIR FACES-

**jinisbest [21:59]**

did you do it?

tbh i dont care

i just wanna know where you got those tings

**yoda [21:59]**

yeah i guess i did

idk where i got it from someone sent it to me

**jinisbest [21:59]**

who?

**yoda [21:59]**

idk

fanmail i guess

it was scary the letter was scary

it said "use this on your members" and i was all

:0

jin?

seokjin?

where did you go?

**jinisbest [22:00]**

JYP PD-NIM!!!!!!!

**yoda [22:00]**

KIM FUCKING SEOKJIN I HATE YOU SO MUCH

ISTFG DONT TELL HIM A THING!

SEOKJINNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_**jinisbest** _ **left the chat**

_**yoda** _ **left the chat**

**jypnim [22:00]**

damn

_**jypnim** _ **left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its almost twices 5th anniversary~~!! theyre the best girls ever and deserve the world :D i cant twice is my happy place :(  
> this chapter makes no sense like why are they texting when theyre right in front of each other??? why was jyp in the chat??? WHY DID TZUYU STONE THE MEMBERS I-
> 
> your guess is as good as mine lmao


	8. not an update but pls read

hihihi,

so I have half of the chapter done, even after a month ik, I'm a slow worker. sooooooo,,,,, it's gonna take me some time to work on this chapter because it's more than just a texting chapter (you'll find out soon, Hopefully.) um so please bear with me and don't leave :(

sorry for taking so long as well. I work at a snail's pace lol. thanks for understanding <333 


	9. truth or consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> taehyung brings a game called truth or consequences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lowkey highkey inspired (more like based off of) by that one ep of svtfoe ( if ykyk. )
> 
> This chapter is storyline-y, meaning that there is an actual plot that may or may not affect the rest of the fic. So just a heads up hehe. And, Jeongguk is gonna be spelled as Jungkook now sorry if that annoys you um...yeah. I got back into the habit of writing Jeongguk as Jungkook so um..ye. Last thing, the game they play is sorta evil??? Idk, you'll find out when you get to that part but it gets strange. just sayin.
> 
> aight thanks for reading my stupid note now enjoy the show uwu

**gay beans and shit**

_**taebear** _ **is typing...**

**taebear [17:33]**

guYS~~~~~

i bought a game

**godjihyoyourass [17:33]**

oh no

what is it

**taebear [17:33]**

ok but we're all gonna play it ok?

because it's really fun!

**honeypunchsana [17:33]**

ooh! what's it of??

**taebear [17:33]**

its called truth,

or consequences

fun huh?

**honeypunchsana [17:33]**

umm..

**crabcatcher [17:33]**

how is that fun?

that sounds threatening!

**godjihyoyourass [17:34]**

yes it does.

sana is not playing that.

**honeypunchsana [17:34]**

but i wanna!

**dancingmomo [17:34]**

me too! 

jimin can i play it?

**chimin [17:34]**

i'll play it with you

i dont want anything happening to you

**jeongyeon:) [17:34]**

ew gross

**chimin [17:34]**

WHY DO YOU HATE ME????

**jeongyeon:) [17:34]**

WHY DO YOU HATE ME?????

**chimin [17:34]**

I DONT YOU STARTED THIS HATE AND NOW I DO

**jeongyeon:) [17:34]**

BECAUSE YOURE MEAN

**chimin [17:34]**

IM MEAN?!!??

**ohnomina! [17:34]**

ok guys

stop

**stfu.yoongi [17:34]**

yeah it sounds like not funny anymore

stop

idiots

cease

halt

**jeongyeon:) [17:34]**

shut up

i dont listen to men

**chimin [17:34]**

cause no men likes you

**jeongyeon:) [17:35]**

taehyung play the fucking game so i can tell this bitch who's the fucking boss

**nabongs [17:35]**

HOLY SHIITTTTTTTTTTT

GO OFF JEONGYEONNNNNN

**ggukkie_ [17:35]**

YES NOOOOONAAAAAAAAAAA

**tigerrawr [17:35]**

GOOOO UNNNNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

**jeongyeon:) [17:35]**

you pathetic short little man

**chimin [17:35]**

play the damn game tae.

**taebear [17:35]**

WAIT-

**chimin [17:35]**

????

**taebear [17:35]**

IM SORRY KOOK IS HILARIOUS I-

HOBI-

**hobihobihope! [17:35]**

NOONA-

**godjihyoyourass [17:35]**

um what

**dubu? [17:35]**

GUYS THIS GAME IS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT FOR US

**crabcatcher [17:35]**

how do you hypothesize? 

and what evidence and authentication do you have for us?

**dubu? [17:35]**

ok no one cares about these big words so stfu

GUYS

we can use this game for like these pairings that just sorta formed somehow idk.

**ohnomina! [17:35]**

what?

wait you mean like jeongyeon and jimin? 

you and namjoon?

**dubu? [17:36]**

YES

or like jimin, momo, and kook

or tae and tzu

or even hobi and tzu

**yoda [17:36]**

no taehyungie is my father

he created me

with fairydust

HE TOLD ME IVE SEEN THE ULTRASOUND

**hobihobihope! [17:36]**

what are you putting in her brain-

**taebear [17:36]**

¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

ok everyone's playing right?

**hobihobihope! [17:36]**

yes

**yoda [17:36]**

yes

**honeypunchsana [17:36]**

yes

**dancingmomo [17:36]**

yes

**dubu? [17:36]**

yes

**crabcatcher [17:36]**

yes

**godjihyoyourass [17:36]**

fine

**ggukkie_ [17:36]**

yes

**chimin [17:36]**

ok.

**jeongyeon:) [17:36]**

ok.

**ohnomina! [17:36]**

sure

**stfu.yoongi [17:36]**

yeah

**nabongs [17:36]**

yass

**tigerrawr [17:36]**

yassssssss

**jinisbest [17:36]**

i just finished getting beautiful so i guess i'll play

**taebear [17:36]**

ok come to my room

**ohnomina! [17:37]**

um we live somewhere else?

**nabongs [17:37]**

pfft

we'll be right over.

**taebear [17:37]**

kk.

see you then!!!!!

**yoda [17:37]**

<33333

**hobihobihope! [17:37]**

*cries*

* * *

The nine girls arrived at the front door of bangtan's household. Nayeon, annoyingly, rang the doorbell with her finger tons of times with a sheepish grin on her face. Jeongyeon rolled her eyes, along with Mina. Finally, the door swung open.

"Can you not?" Seokjin knitted his eyebrows. Nayeon chuckled, inviting herself in as the other girls followed her. Seokjin closed the door and led them to Taehyung's room. Tzuyu skipped to her father's room, a happy smile on her face. She knocked rhythmically on the door and it opened up like Tzuyu knocked some sort of secret code only her and Taehyung know.

"The fuck?" Nayeon knitted her brows, confused and somewhat shocked at how the door opened up with no one twisting it open. 

"Welcome, to my habitat." Taehyung held his arms out wide, a big smile on his face. 

Sana popped out from behind the girls. "Where's the game? I really wanna play!"

"It's this box looking thing." Jungkook grabbed a small, metal cube box. Sana oohed, taking the empty space next to Hoseok. Tzuyu, of course, sat next to Taehyung. Mina, Jihyo, and Nayeon filled the empty space next to Namjoon. Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Jeongyeon took a seat next to Yoongi.

Momo sat next to Jungkook and Jimin. Her pig tails bounced as she plopped herself down, criss-cross. "How do you play?" Momo tilted her head, glancing at her friends. 

"It's simple. The box will ask us to swear an oath that we will _not_ lie and if we do, all of us must face the consequences." Taehyung explained, examining the metal box. Everyone looked appalled, fairly _terrified_ of what consequences could befall them. 

"That sounds...sinister." Dahyun clutched her chest, laughing uncomfortably. Tzuyu hugged her legs, placing her chin on her knee. Taehyung noticed, hugging her tightly almost instantly. Hoseok rolled his eyes out of jealousy.

"It's not sinister. It teaches you to keep your promises." Taehyung answered, getting situated and starting the game. "Okay, everyone ready?" 

Everyone replied with a nod. The lights in Taehyung's bedroom shut off, leaving the glow from the box to be the only light source. Mina squinted, her eyes not being able to handle such brightness. 

"Jeez, that's bright." Mina covered the box with her hand, turning her head away slightly. 

"Not really, you get used to it." Taehyung replied. The game began to talk, the lights blinking with the voice's rhythm.

_"Honesty and candor, fibs and fiction, even with complete conviction. If truth is extinct from these occurrences, all with face the consequences."_

"What does that mean?" Seokjin furrowed his eyebrows.

"It means if you lie to it, something bad will happen." Jihyo responded, pursing her lips. Her face displayed pure worry.

_"Pledge an oath of truth, pinky swear to me."_

"What are we, five?" Yoongi scoffed. The lights turned to an intimidating red, making Yoongi regret his words.

"Don't do that!" Chaeyoung lightly slapped Yoongi's forearm. The lights changed back to white.

"Okay, everyone pinky swear." Taehyung said, placing his pinky finger in the square that opened up in the box. Everyone followed him, saying "The truth." as they went in a circle. 

_"It's now time for, truth or consequences."_

"Ooh, Taehyung, this is already awesome!" Sana clenched her fists, throwing them around cutely. The square closed, turning into a slot machine.

_"The first question."_

Everyone in the circle waited nervously. Mostly the more mature members looked nervous, the rest seemed surprisingly calm. The cards began to flip, one at a time. The deep box voice spoke the words that were displayed upon the cards.

_"What is..."_

Dahyun blinked. Chaeyoung sucked in a breath. Hoseok exhaled.

_"Your..."_

Mina bit her bottom lip. Jimin clutched onto Jungkook's hand. 

_"Favorite color?"_

Everyone exchanged glances, seeming confused. "Uh, Tae?" Seokjin turned to Taehyung.

"Oh, guys, the first question is always easy! Maybe the next one is something interesting, like, 'Have you ever killed someone?'" Taehyung shrugged. "Mm, actually, still easy." Namjoon stuttered out nonsense. Taehyung never seems to fail to shock Namjoon.

"Taehyung, your favorite color?" Tzuyu gazed at the older.

"Purple. Y'all already know that though so.." Taehyung smiled. "What about you, Tzu?"

"Indigo."

"Apricot." Jihyo stared at her feet, wiggling her toes.

"Black, pink, purple." Namjoon said, earning a glare from Dahyun. "What?"

"I like white, take that." Dahyun remarked. Namjoon squinted his eyes, getting all kinds of confused.

"Same." Yoongi lowly voiced, sounding raspy. 

"Why do you sound like..dead?" Nayeon chuckled. "Anyway, mine's sky blue."

"I like blue." Seokjin added.

"I thought you liked pink?" Dahyun queried.

"Nah, blue is hotter."

"Wha-"

"I like blue and black." Jimin smiled.

"Excuse me, she was talking." Jeongyeon scowled. Jimin rolled his eyes, not caring. Every member went down the circle and said their favorite colors.

"Mint." Mina quietly spoke, smiling.

"Yellow-Green." Jeongyeon glared at Jimin, who glared back.

"Pink!" Momo giggled.

"Red." Chaeyoung raised her index finger.

"Green." Hoseok added.

"Black." Jungkook said.

"Purple~" Sana sang.

_"Someone's lying."_

The box spoke, bewildering everyone. "Who lies about your favorite-" Nayeon was cut off with a sudden attack of ticklish beams on her stomach. She cackled, cradling her stomach. Each member was being tickled violently, to the point where they couldn't voice coherent words. 

"Hahaahaa!! O-One of us-Ahah!!-S-Speak up!!!" Dahyun yelled, laughing uncontrollably. 

"O-Okay! Fine! I-It's still pink!" Seokjin shouted. The tickling beams shut off at the sound of Seokjin's voice. 

_"Truth."_

"Why would you lie about that?" Nayeon whined.

"I just hate contributing to gender stereotypes." Seokjin shrugged. Nayeon nodded, understanding.

"That's dumb, you know we don't care." Namjoon spoke up. 

_"Next question."_

Everyone shut themselves up and listened carefully.

_"What is your most embarrassing story?"_

Jimin sighed, "Wow, I have a lot of those. Um, let's see, where to start?" Jimin pondered.

"Oh jeez." Jeongyeon rolled her eyes. "Think of your _most_ embarrassing one and we'll go in the meantime, idiot."

"Fuck you."

"Uh, I once tried to flip a pancake and it landed on the floor in front of my friends." Taehyung smiled, laughing to himself.

"That's so you." Chaeyoung commented. "I never grew."

"Wait, that's yours?" Taehyung pointed. "That's not a story, that's just embarrassing."

"Shut up." Chaeyoung pouted, twirling a strand of her hair with her finger.

"I can't blow a bubble with gum." Namjoon winced, ready for the attack of insults from Dahyun.

"Pfft, really? Wow, that's so sad!" Dahyun continued on with the insults, Namjoon not caring to listen.

As everyone said their own embarrassing story, the exception of Nayeon and Seokjin because _apparently,_ there's nothing to be embarrassed about when you look like them. Jimin's turn finally neared.

"Alright, idiot. Tell us." Jeongyeon rudely said. 

Jimin stick his tongue out at her. "Okay, well, I thought long and hard about this."

"Shit, how many embarrassing stories do you have?" Nayeon raised her eyebrows.

"Too many. Anyway, me and my friend ate this monstrosity of a hot dog. Covered in melted cheese and breaded."

"Ew." Taehyung commented.

"Shh. We were almost back home when he keeps telling me to walk faster because he was about to shit himself."

"Oh my God.." Jungkook chuckled.

"Then out of nowhere, I start barfing." Jimin began to laugh. "It was a busy intersection, by the way. I threw up 5 times in under a minute, while jogging and people gasping at us in their cars."

"Holy fuck-" Jungkook got cut off.

"He was grabbing his ass as he runs, and I'm behind him vomiting everywhere. The end."

Everyone fell silent.

"J-Jimin.." Jungkook was cut off again.

"Wait, wasn't that us?" Taehyung asked, tilting his head over to Jimin.

"No it- OH MY GOD!!" Jimin fell into Jungkook's lap, laughing hysterically.

"You're the one who was grabbing his ass?" Nayeon added.

"Guilty." Taehyung smiled, seeming not embarrassed whatsoever. 

"Jimin wins." Tzuyu pointed to said boy.

"It wasn't a competition-" Sadly, Jungkook was interrupted once more. 

_"Someone's lying."_

As a punishment, everyone was sent back to their embarrassing memories, Jimin's vomit-hot-dog situation, Taehyung's pancake fit. Since it was just a trance, everyone was in their own little world, eyes closed and sitting up straight as a board. Each member cringed at different times as they experienced the painful embarrassment again.

"Wh-Who's lying?" Tzuyu spoke up, struggling to get her words out.

"S-Seokjin? W-Was it you a-again?" Momo quiered, cringing shortly after.

"No!" Seokjin denied instantly.

"S-Someone," Jimin gagged. "A-Answer, please!"

"Al-Alright! It was me! I actually _do_ have an embarrassing story.." Nayeon admitted, covering her face with her hair.

"Ooh~ What is it?" Hoseok smiled, ready to hear Nayeon's humiliation. 

"Um, so, I don't think it's _that_ embarrassing as Jimin and Tae's hot dog story, but, once, when I was at my 8th grade graduation, I broke the chair I sat in, and everyone laughed at me. It was great." Nayeon chuckled.

_"Truth."_

"Oh my God, that's so sad. Are you okay?" Sana pouted, her eyes getting bigger. 

"Yes, Sana, of course I'm okay. I'm Im fucking Nayeon!"

"Hehe, okay." Sana smiled.

_"Last question."_

"Aww..Last one?" Sana pouted.

_"Who do you.."_

_"Have a..."_

_"Crush on?"_

Fuck.

"Wow, okay, um, I'm done playing." Namjoon held his hands up in defeat. 

"It's okay, we can do this." Taehyung grabbed Tzuyu's hand, who grabbed Momo's, and so on. Soon, everyone in the room was holding hands, ready for the game. Hoseok inhaled deeply through his nostrils, thinking the game was going to call on him first. 

_"Who do you have a crush on?"_

The game asked Taehyung first.

"Park Jimin." Taehyung looked to the tiny boy with a boxy smile. 

"Aw, that's sweet," Jimin eye-smiled. "But, I have a crush on Jungkook." Jimin turned to his right, pressing foreheads with said boy. Taehyung's jaw dropped, a scoffed leaving his mouth. Tzuyu pouted, leaning her head on her father's shoulder. 

"And I have a crush on Jimin." Jungkook smiled at the older next to him. 

"But you two aren't low-key dating?" Hoseok asked, giggling lightly.

"Yeah, so?" Jimin shrugged, then quickly turned back to Jungkook.

_"Who do you have a crush on?"_

The game asked Hoseok next.

"Well, it's difficult." He sighed. "I wouldn't say I have a crush _crush_ but, if I have to, probably Yoongi." 

"Ew." Yoongi answered back, making a disgust expression.

"That was obvious." Chaeyoung commented, adjusting her position. 

_"Who do you have a crush on?"_

The game asked Yoongi. Everyone averted their entire attention to Yoongi, anticipated. 

"No one." Yoongi said, with a poker face.

"Psh! You like Mina!" Jungkook pointed at the two with his fingers. 

"No, I don't. Why do you always think that?" Yoongi tilted his head slightly to the right.

"Because...it's the truth."

"You have no proof." Jeongyeon chimed in.

"Shut up!" Jungkook brought his knees to his chest, resting his chin on them.

_"Who do you have a crush on?"_

As everyone went, (Nayeon+Seokjin; themselves. Tzuyu; her father but not like that ok? Joon; crabs. Momo+Sana; Mike wazowski. Jeongyeon; gross, no one. Dahyun; tofu. Mina; no one.) they sighed in relief, thinking the game was over. 

"Alright, who wants ice cream?" Taehyung excitingly said, loudly. Of course, Sana and Momo instantly responded "Yes,". 

_"Someone's lying...."_

"Of course someone is! I bet it's Yoongi and Mina, watch." Jungkook folded his arms, glancing at the two said members.

"Can you please stop? It's obviously not us. We're only friends." Mina stared, convincing Jungkook. 

"You're right, I'll stop." Jungkook looked down to his feet.

"Wait, what's the punishment?" Dahyun looked at the glowing cube on the floor, eyebrows knitted.

"I guess...there isn't one." Jihyo said. They all murmured "Yeah," and began to walk to the door and get some ice cream. The door suddenly vanished, turning black. Everything vanished and turned into a black room, with zero contenants. 

"Wh-What?" Momo rushed over to Jimin, hugging him tightly. 

"Taehyung! What just happened?!" Jihyo shouted, obviously panicking.

"I-I don't know! This hasn't happened before-"

_"No one is going anywhere until the liar admits their truth."_

Sana whimpered, sitting in the corner with her head in her arms. Hoseok walked over and comforted her, scared as well but didn't show it. The leaders began to slightly panic, trying to keep calm for their members. The maknae lines of both groups were panicking, not liking the darkness and being trapped in just a box. 

"Let us out!" Taehyung pounded on the walls, knowing that no one could hear them.

"OhmyGodohmyGodohmyGod-" Momo's grip on Jimin tightened. Jimin held her close, shaking lightly. 

_"Scream all you want, quiver with fear. No one is leaving until the liar tells their truth."_

"But..it's not really lying." Mina said calmly, walking slowly over to the glowing cube. Everyone's eyes widened.

_"What?"_

"I mean, sometimes you don't know what you think. Your head and your heart disagree. _"_ Mina placed her hand on her chest. "You might think one thing at first, but then it changes. That's apart of human life."

Yoongi smiled.

"Seokjin, ask me my favorite color." 

"But you already said it's mint." Seokjin said.

"Ask me again." Mina's lips curved into a small smile.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Right now? Purple."

The game's color turned green, then red. It altered between colors.

_"Wait! No! You can't do that!"_

"You think of everything as black & white, and you can't." 

_"S-Stop it!"_

"It's a rainbow of feelings, changing as you grow." Mina moved her arm in the shape of a rainbow.

_"Stop it!!"_

The game shouted, becoming smaller and smaller until it was wilted and shriveled. Their surroundings turned back into Taehyung's room, sighs of relief escaping each members lips. 

"Good job, Mina." Namjoon patted her shoulder. She smiled, looking back and spotting Yoongi half smiling too. She picked up the cube and planned to throw it out once all of them walked headed of the room.

"That was crazy." Jihyo said, twisting open the front door. 

"Yep. Thanks for coming." Taehyung waved. 

As they bid their goodbyes, Yoongi and Mina shared a smile.

"Why are you holding that vicious cube?" Dahyun pointed to the busted game with a confused expression.

"Im throwing it out." Mina said, simultaneously tossing it in a trash bin outside of bangtan's household. 

"Ah." 

The girls enjoyed the rest of their day.

_"Truth, Myoui Mina and Min Yoongi have a crush on..."_


	10. the holiday truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the two groups enjoy christmas together, building gingerbread houses, decorating trees, and giving presents. 
> 
> but what happens when someone spills Mina's secret?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOUD and CHAOTIC but also ANGST and SAD tingz ahead.
> 
> ahem...sorry.

**gay beans and shit**

_**hobihobihope!** _ **is typing...**

**hobihobihope! [14:22]**

DECK THE HALLS WITH BOUGHS OF HOLLY!!!!!

**dubu? [14:22]**

FA LALALA LA LA LA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**jeongyeon:) [14:22]**

shut up

**nabongs [14:23]**

GRINCH!!!

**hobihobihope! [14:23]**

YEAH THIS IS THE BEST TIME OF THE YEAARRRRRR!!!!

**godjihyoyourass [14:23]**

its christmas!

**nabongs [14:23]**

🥳🥳🥳🎅🏿🎅🏿🎅🏿🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

**crabcatcher [14:23]**

yall are hurting my eardrums.

**dubu? [14:23]**

GOOD.

**nabongs [14:23]**

as we should be😌

**hobihobihope! [14:23]**

sorry joonie but i agree with them!

hehe lub u

<33

**crabcatcher [14:23]**

ok.

**chimin [14:23]**

i'm at the mall literally buying you guys presents as i speak.

**jeongyeon:) [14:23]**

youre not speaking.

youre clearly texting.

get it fucking right.

**chimin [14:23]**

and just for that, youre getting crossed off my list!

**jeongyeon:) [14:23]**

and i care why?

**chimin [14:23]**

you dont get any christmas presents from me anymore!!

**tigerrawr [14:24]**

you were gonna get jeongyeon a PRESENT!?!?!???

**nabongs [14:24]**

im jungshook

**ggukkie_ [14:24]**

no i am

**nabongs [14:24]**

no i am

**ggukkie_ [14:24]**

no i am

**nabongs [14:24]**

no i am

**ggukkie_ [14:24]**

no i am

**ohnomina! [14:24]**

no youre stupid.

**tigerrawr [14:24]**

MINAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!

I MISSED YOUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!

**ohnomina! [14:24]**

missed you too!

**ggukkie_ [14:24]**

gaE

**ohnomina! [14:24]**

f off.

**dubu? [14:24]**

SHUT UP

WE HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO SHAREEEE

**jinisbest [14:24]**

aye aye captain!

**honeypunchsana [14:25]**

i heard you guys were planning stuff for christmas!

**dancingmomo [14:25]**

wahh really???

**hobihobihope! [14:25]**

you are correct, minatozaki sana!

btw i lub u

**honeypunchsana [14:25]**

uwu lub u toooo!!!!!!!

**godjihyoyourass [14:25]**

please

just

tell

us

please

**dubu? [14:25]**

oK!

well first,

me and hobi bought supplies for gingerbread houses!

**crabcatcher [14:25]**

hobi and i

**dubu? [14:25]**

huh

**crabcatcher [14:25]**

it's hobi and i not me and hobi

**dubu? [14:25]**

ugh i hate you

**crabcatcher [14:25]**

back at you

**dancingmomo [14:25]**

I WANNA BUILD A GINGERBREAD HOUSE!

**chimin [14:25]**

ok wonderful baby!! 

wait till i get homee~~

**dancingmomo [14:25]**

I WANNA BUILD ONE RIGHT NOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**taebear [14:26]**

HAHAHAHAAHAHAH 

**dancingmomo [14:26]**

also we live somewhere else

**ohnomina! [14:26]**

yeah why do you guys always forget that we do?

**stfu.yoongi [14:26]**

maybe it's because they're brains are slowly evaporating

and cannot retain simple info

like you guys living somewhere else

**ohnomina! [14:26]**

oh yeah true

**hobihobihope! [14:26]**

hey!

our brains are not evaporating!

**taebear [14:26]**

if anything, they're rotting!

**ggukkie_ [14:26]**

how is that better hyung

**taebear [14:26]**

wait whats better?

**stfu.yoongi [14:26]**

you see what i have to deal with 24/7?

**nabongs [14:26]**

LMAO

**jinisbest [14:26]**

YALL JUST JEALOUS CAUSE IM WWH 

**godjihyoyourass [14:26]**

who said that we're jealous

also who cares

**jeongyeon:) [14:26]**

seokjin

nobody

wants

to

hear

worldwide hansome

one

more

fucking

time.

**jinisbest [14:27]**

fuck i didnt know that someone who's like a puppy could tear me to shreds.

thanks for letting me know, jeongs.

**jeongyeon:) [14:27]**

dont call me that.

**dubu? [14:27]**

EVERYBODY WHO WANTS TO BUILD A GINGERBREAD HOUSE GET YOUR ASSES OVER HERE AND MAKE ONE

**dancingmomo [14:27]**

coming!

**honeypunchsana [14:27]**

hobi~

**hobihobihope! [14:27]**

yes~?

**honeypunchsana [14:27]**

can you bring more icings and candies?

dahyunie said you bought some

**hobihobihope! [14:27]**

omg anything for you<33

**yoda [14:27]**

guys.

**taebear [14:27]**

AHHH HI DAUGHTERR

**yoda [14:27]**

ello.

but guys.

**tigerrawr [14:27]**

huh

**yoda [14:27]**

i found the best thing ever.

a meet and greet with santa.

**dancingmomo [14:27]**

wait what

**nabongs [14:27]**

i think momo just shat her pants

ShE LOVES SANtA!!!!!

**jinisbest [14:27]**

but they have those every year?

you know

the mall ones?

**yoda [14:28]**

yes but this santa comes to your house

like omg hes my idol

**ggukkie_ [14:28]**

OMG SAME

joonie~

can we get santa to come~~???

**crabcatcher [14:28]**

why are you talking to me?

hobi and dahyun planned this

**ggukkie_ [14:28]**

hobi~

dahyunie~

**dubu? [14:28]**

im on board with this santa thing

maybe i can finally get heelys

**hobihobihope! [14:28]**

same

he never got me sprite tho

even when i specifically told him that THAT was the only thing i wanted.

actually it was cranberry sprite

but whatever

YES

**chimin[14:28]**

okay wait so rn we're building gingerbread houses at the twice dorm

and then what?

santa claus?

**dubu? [14:28]**

no no 

we decorate the tree at our dorm, then yours.

and THEN

it's santa

**honeypunchsana [14:28]**

EEEE

**ohnomina! [14:28]**

scary

jihyo stop this

**godjihyoyourass [14:28]**

sigh

dont bring santa minas afraid

**ohnomina! [14:28]**

WHAT-

WHO SAID I WAS AFRAID??

**taebear [14:28]**

umm

you?

**nabongs [14:28]**

yeah remember that time when we were walking out in seoul,

and there was this riot of people wanting to take a pic with santa

AND MINA FUCKING SCREAMED HAHAAHA

**yoda [14:29]**

OMG I REMEMBER THAT!!!

THEN SHE RAN INTO THE MCDONALDS AND SAW RONALD MCDONALD 

AND SHAT HER PANTSSSSSSS

holy fuck im wheezing

**jinisbest [14:29]**

youre kidding

mina isnt really afraid of santa claus, is she?

**ohnomina! [14:29]**

of course not!

**nabongs [14:29]**

hell yeah she is!

**godjihyoyourass [14:29]**

its true

lmao that ronald mcdonald moment was fucking hilarious

**ohnomina! [14:29]**

i hate all of you

**stfu.yoongi [14:29]**

lmao thats cute

**ggukkie_ [14:29]**

WAIT WHAT

YOU THINK THAT MINA BEING AFRAID OF SANTA IS CUTE?!?!?

holy shit you're in love

**stfu.yoongi [14:29]**

jungkook istfg 

who the fuck said i was in love?

**hobihobihope! [14:29]**

lol forget about our christmas plans

this is way better

**dubu? [14:29]**

right?

*grabs popcorn*

**ggukkie_ [14:29]**

you just said it.

"lmao thats cute"

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAAANNN

**stfu.yoongi [14:29]**

literally all i mean is it's cute, she hates us.

i was being sarcastic.

cant you all take a fucking joke without turning it into some conspiracy theory?

jfc

**honeypunchsana [14:29]**

OKAY CAN WE BUILD THE GINGERBREAD HOUSES NOW????

like i'm gonna explode hurry up

**chimin [14:30]**

i just pulled in

BUT

i have your guys' gifts in the car

so like...

what do i do

WAIT

**jeongyeon:) [14:30]**

oh my god.

**chimin [14:30]**

your lucky i still even got you a present.

**jeongyeon:) [14:30]**

wait

you still got me one?

**hobihobihope! [14:30]**

AWWW JIMIN LOVES JEONGYEONNNN

cuties :>

**chimin [14:30]**

no im just nice

unlike her

ANYWAYS

the presents are in the trunk

guys get down here

**crabcatcher [14:30]**

coming

**stfu.yoongi [14:30]**

jungkook still wont stfu about me and mina

**ohnomina! [14:30]**

cant you just

silence him?

**ggukkie_ [14:30]**

WOW OKAY I DIDNT KNOW HOW HATED I WAS

so mean..

:( 

**taebear [14:30]**

CHEWY IM COMING

**yoda [14:30]**

YAY

**jinisbest [14:30]**

ok i have arrived

**chimin [14:30]**

i can see that

get in

**jinisbest [14:30]**

you're not gonna open the door for me?

**tigerrawr [14:30]**

why are you guys texting when you're literally right there?

**jinisbest [14:30]**

shh

jimin open the door for me

**chimin [14:30]**

why should i

**jinisbest [14:30]**

cause its me!

dont you love me?

**chimin [14:30]**

no

but ok

**jinisbest [14:30]**

rude

**hobihobihope! [14:31]**

HIIIII GURLSSSSSSSS IM HEREEEEEE

**godjihyoyourass [14:31]**

STOP TEXTING WHEN YOURE RIGHT IN FRONT OF EACH OTHER

its a waste of cellular data.

**crabcacther [14:31]**

she's right

c'mon yoongi

jk stop harassing him

**ggukkie_ [14:31]**

who said i was harassing him?

im simply interrogating him.

**ohnomina! [14:31]**

form of harassment.

on the verge of it.

**ggukkie_ [14:31]**

youre just saying that cause you LOVE HIIIMMMM~~~~~~

**ohnomina! [14:31]**

shut up and get your detective ass over here

**ggukkie_ [14:31]**

:O

**ohnomina! [14:31]**

what

 _**ggukkie_** _ **changed their name to _detectivekook_**

**detectivekook [14:31]**

MIN YOONGI, YOU ARE GUILTY

**stfu.yoongi [14:31]**

im right next to you.

also thats judge judy not detective kook

**detectivekook [14:31]**

want be to change it to judge judy

**godjihyoyourass [14:31]**

if you change your name to judge judy then ill bring nayeon to court

**nabongs [14:31]**

THE FUCK DID I DO?????!!!!

**godjihyoyourass [14:31]**

YOU MADE THE MESS IN THE LIVING ROOM AND KEPT SAYING YOU'D CLEAN IT AND YOU NEVER DIDD!!!!!!

**hobihobihope! [14:31]**

ahh scary jihyo :[

**jinisbest [14:31]**

jimin start the car

**chimin [14:31]**

what about hobi?

**hobihobihope! [14:31]**

im already here jackass

**chimin [14:31]**

*is hurt*

what about tae?

**taebear [14:31]**

im here too

**hobihobihope! [14:31]**

what?

no youre not

**taebear [14:32]**

yeah i am

**yoda [14:32]**

its true hes with me

**dubu? [14:32]**

doing what?

**yoda [14:32]**

we're eating panda express

**taebear [14:32]**

FUUCKKK I LOOOVVVEEE PANDA EXPRESSSSSSSS

**jeongyeon:) [14:32]**

hey siri, how to end life

**stfu.yoongi [14:32]**

exactly

**crabcatcher [14:32]**

this groupchat is a mess

**hobihobihope! [14:32]**

｡*ﾟ+.*.｡(っ ᐛ )っ✂️╰⋃╯

**tigerrawr [14:32]**

uh

* * *

**chimin [15:19]**

NO MOMO THATS NOT HOW YOU DO IT

**dancingmomo [15:19]**

THEN FUCKING TELL ME

**chimin [15:19]  
**

DONT TALK TO ME LIKE THAT

**ohnomina! [15:19]**

WHY ARE YOU GUYS SCREAMING VIA TEXT WHEN YOU CAN SCREAM AT EACH OTHER

makes no fucking sense

**honeypunchsana [15:20]**

cause it makes dollars

**tigerrawr [15:20]**

OHHHHHH wow

sana you are so cute

my baby!!

**honeypunchsana [15:20]**

im older than you

**tigerrawr [15:20]**

way to ruin the moment :(

**hobihobihope! [15:20]**

how hard is it to build a gingerbread house?

like tf we dont need all this drama.

**ohnomina! [15:20]**

it's because they're incompentent.

**hobihobihope! [15:20]**

true true

**chimin [15:20]**

we are NOT incompentent!

momo was building the structure wrong!

**ohnomina! [15:20]**

everyone builds it differently

you always start with lining the base with frosting

momo was going right in

**dancingmomo [15:20]**

i was looking forward to it!!!

you were being a big meanie to me :(

**chimin [15:20]**

omfg im so sorry my love omg

oh my let me make it up to you<333

**dancing [15:20]**

kk!!!!

**dubu? [15:20]**

why didn't you just tell her that instead of texting?

**chimin [15:20]**

shut up!

jungkookieee~~~~

**detectivekook [15:20]**

yessss~~~~~

**chimin [15:20]**

help me and momo

now

**detective [15:21]**

rude but fine

**jeongyeon:) [15:21]**

how are you so fine with him

like hes a bitch

**chimin [15:21]**

no one asked.

**detectivekook [15:21]**

ikr but i put up with it

**hobihobihope! [15:21]**

HAHAHAHAHAHAH

**chimin [15:21]**

JUNGKOOK

you hurt my fweewings :(

**jeongyeon:) [15:21]**

so?

**detectivekook [15:21]**

OH MY GOD IM SO SORRY JIMINIE ARE YOU OKAY???

OMG LET ME HELP 

i lub u :((((

**jeongyeon:) [15:21]**

what?

you-

why-

you just said that he's a bitch??!!

**detectivekook [15:21]**

yes but i love the bitch

**chimin [15:21]**

ok please stop calling me that

momo put the gumdrop down

**dancingmomo [15:21]**

make me!

**chimin [15:21]**

jeez

this is what being a single father feels like

**yoda [15:21]**

you're not a dad

TAEHYUNG IS A DAD

**taebear [15:22]**

THATS WRITE I AM

**crabcatcher [15:22]**

you spelled right incorrectly

**taebear [15:22]**

no thats

WOAHHH

i had no idea

**crabcatcher [15:22]**

i cant any more

**honeypunchsana [15:22]**

lookie!!

me and tzuyu finished our gingerbread house!!

isnt it cute??

**hobihobihope! [15:22]**

the cutest

i love the little gumdrop people!!

**yoda [15:22]**

yes

i decorated the little xmas trees

i LOVE it

**taebear [15:22]**

its beautiful

**yoda [15:22]**

like me?

**taebear [15:22]**

like me :)

**dubu? [15:22]**

LMAO

**nabongs [15:22]**

okay im ready to meet santa

**tigerrawr [15:22]**

we still have to finish up our gingerbread houses and decorate the trees!!

**nabongs [15:22]**

that kiddie shit can wait

**detectivekook [15:22]**

oh and meeting santa isnt?

**nabongs [15:23]**

shut up or get your face ripped off

**detectivekook [15:23]**

EVILLLLL

**jinisbest [15:23]**

okay but nayeon is right

**detectivekook [15:23]**

ABOUT RIPPING OFF MY FACE!??!?

wow the love

**jinisbest [15:23]**

not that idiot

lets just go see santa now

i reaaaaaally wanna

**hobihobihope! [15:23]**

lol same

dahyunie

can we cut this short??

**dubu? [15:23]**

the fuck?

NO

**tigerrawr [15:23]**

pleaaaaaaaaassssseeeeeeee

**nabongs [15:23]**

pleasseeeee

**jinisbest [15:23]**

pwease?

**dubu? [15:23]**

its only the three of you and hobi who wanna meet santa rn

what about the rest of you?

**yoda [15:23]**

i do!

**honeypunchsana [15:23]**

me too!

**dancingmomo [15:24]**

same!!

**godjihyoyourass [15:24]**

i could seriously care less

**stfu.yoongi [15:24]**

same

that probably goes for the rest of bangtan, 

except jungkook.

**detectivekook [15:24]**

SAINT NICOLAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IM COMINGGGGGGGGGGGG

**stfu.yoongi [15:24]**

see

**ohnomina! [15:24]**

im a definite no

i will not see santa

terrifying

**hobihobihope! [15:24]**

cmon!!!

you dont have to talk to him just come with!!

**ohnomina! [15:24]**

no i cant be anywhere near that monster

**nabongs [15:24]**

pleaasee??

i'll comfort u <333

**ohnomina! [15:24]**

i'd rather die

**nabongs [15:24]**

well shit

**tigerrawr [15:24]**

please minari???????

i'd love it if you came!!

**ohnomina! [15:24]**

no thanks

**stfu.yoongi [15:24]**

come on

**ohnomina! [15:25]**

fine

**detectivekook [15:25]**

OH SO WHEN YOONGI SAYS COME YOU GIVE IN?!?!?

cant yall just say that youre dating like its fucking annoying that u wont

**chimin [15:25]**

they'll come out on dispatch on jan 1

**godjihyoyourass [15:25]**

lmao but for real tho

they are dating

**jinisbest [15:25]**

thatd be great 

my ship wouldve sailed

**dubu? [15:25]**

i think what jihyo's implying is that they really are

t o g e t h e r

**jinisbest [15:25]**

wait what

**hobihobihope! [15:25]**

HOLY SHIT

**detectivekook [15:25]**

BITCH I JUST CRAPPED MY PANTS

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!?

**godjihyoyourass [15:25]**

no

**stfu.yoongi [15:25]**

yes

**ohnomina! [15:25]**

yes

**nabongs [15:25]**

its true

i think

although ive never seen them interact with each other????

**detectivekook [15:25]**

its called being secretive 

BUT OMG MY YEAR HAS BEEN MADE

**stfu.yoongi [15:25]**

your year is about to end

**detectivekook [15:25]**

I MEANT 2021!!!!!!!!

**crabcatcher [15:25]**

does all of twice know?

and how do you know? i wouldnt expect mina wanting to tell any of you

**ohnomina! [15:25]**

of course i wouldn't if we actually WERE dating

but we're not

**stfu.yoongi [15:25]**

ditto

**chimin [15:26]**

i dont see it

**taebear [15:26]**

WHAT

**hobihobihope! [15:26]**

the fuck u mean

**jinisbest [15:26]**

theyre the same person

literally

**chimin [15:26]**

you both could do better

**stfu.yoongi [15:26]**

ikr

**jeongyeon:) [15:26]**

says the one who cant even get jungkook to stop cheating on you

**chimin [15:26]**

WHAT

**detectivekook [15:26]**

JIMIN IM SORRY IT WAS ONE TIME AND ITLL BE THE LAST!!

I SWEAR!!!!

**chimin [15:26]**

WITH WHO!?

**detectivekook [15:26]**

he goes to another school :P

**jinisbest [15:26]**

wtf lol

**chimin [15:26]**

okay but

MOMO WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY ABOUT THE GUMDROPS!?

**dancingmomo [15:26]**

IM SORRRYYYYYY

**godjihyoyourass [15:26]**

YOU MADE HER CRY!!

bastard

**chimin [15:26]**

IM SORRYY

**detectivekook [15:26]**

YOU MADE HIM CRYY!!!

**dubu? [15:26]**

uh what the fuck is happening

**tigerrawr [15:26]**

why is everyone crying

**yoda [15:26]**

TAEHYUNG STOP CRYING

**taebear [15:26]**

I CANT

**crabcatcher [15:26]**

um

kids lets go meet santa

**taebear [15:26]**

ooh yay!

**chimin [15:26]**

ok

**dancingmomo [15:26]**

YAYAYAYYA FINALLYYY

**honeypunchsana [15:26]**

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKK

**hobihobihope! [15:27]**

hooray

wippee

yahoo

mazeltov

**detectivekook [15:27]**

so were just gonna ignore the fact that yoongi and mina are a thing?

wow ok

**stfu.yoongi [15:27]**

ok for the last fucking time we arent dating

**crabcatcher [15:27]**

uhhh kook?

**detectivekook [15:27]**

ye

**crabcatcher [15:27]**

you better agree with him bc minas creeping up behind you with a plastic bag

**detectivekook [15:27]**

HOLY FUCK HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THAT!?

**ohnomina! [15:27]**

bitch

you should pay attention to my username more

**detectivekook [15:27]**

noted.

SANTA TIME

**yoda [15:27]**

OML

**taebear [15:27]**

uwu

* * *

**hobihobihope! [16:58]**

i asked santa for a boyfriend

**godjihyoyourass [16:58]**

thats nice

hope you get what you want

**nabongs [16:58]**

lmao you asked for a bf?

i have like 20

**tigerrawr [16:58]**

nayeon why

**nabongs [16:58]**

cause i can

and im awesome

and pretty

and talented

and nice

**detectivekook [16:59]**

lol no

OKAY BUT BACK TO YOONGI AND MINA...

**chimin [16:59]  
**

i still think they both can do better

**crabcatcher [16:59]**

please

yoongi cant attract a piece of dust

**hobihobihope! [16:59]**

thats rude :(

**taebear [16:59]**

okay but for real tho,

are you two really dating?

* * *

**mina [16:34]**

i cant do this

i cant

**yoongi [16:34]**

what do you mean?

**mina [16:34]**

i dont want us to be a secret anymore

**yoongi [16:34]**

wait what

you wanna go public?

mina, thatll destroy our image

**mina [16:35]**

no..

i wanna split up

**yoongi [16:34]**

minari, no

we're not splitting up

its difficult right now but we can push through

i promise

please

no

**mina [16:35]**

yoongi

i said i cant take all this mental abuse

its not you

its my own head

im twisting it up inside my mind

and i hate it

im sorry

i love you

but i cant be with you anymore

**yoongi [16:35]**

mina..

please dont

mina i cant

mina im sorry

what did i do?

ill fix it if it means i can be with you

minari...

**mina [16:36]**

i told you, yoongi

its me

not you

i love you so much

**yoongi [16:36]**

then stay with me!

mina were in fucking public right now

i cant be crying my ass off because of this

**mina [16:36]**

its my fault now isnt it?

im the reason why your image will be destroyed

arent i?

**yoongi [16:36]**

minari no

you twisted my words

i love you 

okay?

please just stay with me i know we can work this out if you just give me a chance

minari please

i dont wanna loose you

please

**mina [16:36]**

you see now how i twist things up in my mind

thats why i cant do this

**yoongi [16:36]**

ill help you!

minari we can fix this together!

**mina [16:36]**

im so sorry yoongi

merry christmas

**yoongi [16:36]**

mina

_**Message not** **delivered** **.** _ ****

* * *

**hobihobihope! [17:01]**

uh so

you two still alive?

i mean all we did was meet santa

**ohnomina! [17:01]**

yeah hi im here

**nabongs [17:01]**

are you dating yoongi

**ohnomina! [17:01]**

no

**chimin [17:01]**

guys i hear sniffling coming from yoongis room

is he sick?

**jeongyeon:) [17:01]**

hes probably crying, shit face

**chimin [17:01]**

thanks ass wipe

**godjihyoyourass [17:01]**

HEY

stop with those insulting insults, insulters

**chimin [17:02]**

k

should i knock?

**detectivekook [17:02]**

no i will

im detective kook

**chimin [17:02]**

of course

**hobihobihope! [17:02]**

what the hell was that noise

**detectivekook [17:02]**

yoongi threw me out

bc he was crying

MINA WHAT DID YOU DO

**ohnomina! [17:02]**

why do you automatically accuse me?

**detectivekook [17:02]**

because youre dating

**ohnomina! [17:03]**

ok but i didnt do anything

**stfu.yoongi [17:03]**

she didnt do anything

**yoda [17:03]**

AWWW LOOK AT THE LOVVEEE

**jinisbest [17:03]**

LOVE IS IN THE AIRRRR

_**stfu.yoongi has left the chat** _

_**ohnomina! has left the chat** _

**jinisbest [17:03]**

uh what

**crabcatcher [17:03]**

wait whatd we do?

**chimin [17:03]**

oh no we hurt them :(

**honeypunchsana [17:03]**

im worried for mina!! :((

**taebear [17:03]**

maybe we should help

**godjihyoyourass [17:03]**

i think its safe to assume this isnt our problem and we should stay out of it

**dubu? [17:03]**

but..

drama

**godjihyoyourass [17:03]**

theres obviously something deeper going on between them so lets not poke our noses into their own 

business

**chimin [17:03]**

i hate it when youre right

**nabongs [17:03]**

i know so god damn annoying

**godjihyoyourass [17:03]**

thats the god jihyo effect :)

* * *

**mina [17:04]**

i told you were done min yoongi

stop texting me

**yoongi [17:04]**

you obviously wanted to text me because you unblocked me

and i thought you couldnt receive texts from blocked numbers??

**mina [17:04]**

stfu

i want to tell you that were done a million times to engrave in your mind

because you cant seem to process that

were over

**yoongi [17:04]**

fine

be a bitch

go ahead and think that i care

because i dont 

i dont fucking care about you anymore

get out of my life

**mina [17:04]**

you took the words right out of my mouth

fuck off

**yoongi [17:04]**

you too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oml im so sorry for making this sad :( next chapter will dive deeper into their relationship!
> 
> thanks for reading!!


	11. because i know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some angst-y things. not much tho. momo ends up being some sort of psychic lol.
> 
> i half-assed the "diving deeper" into their relationship. sorry. next chap WILL dive deeper, promise!!

**uhhhhh wtf is happening with yoongi and mina???**

_**jinisbest** _ **is typing...**

**jinisbest [17:05]**

uhhhhh wtf is happening

**godjihyoyourass [17:05]**

didn't we agree not to stick our noses into their own business?

it doesn't have anything to do with us.

**chimin [17:05]**

yeah but

**godjihyoyourass [17:05]**

but what?

**chimin [17:05]**

we're worried :(

like they just left the chat!

**dubu? [17:05]**

who was admin again?

**crabcatcher [17:05]**

didn't we make it taehyung

**jeongyeon:) [17:05]**

TAEHYUNG!?

of all people!?

**taebear [17:05]**

hey!!

don't be mean :(((

**detectivekook [17:06]**

she's notorious for being a meanie lmao.

taehyung add back yoongi and mina

**taebear [17:06]**

ok

wait

**jinisbest [17:06]**

oh jeez what

**taebear [17:06]**

they blocked me haha

:P

**nabongs [17:06]**

why would they block you?

you don't have anything to do with whats going on between them

**hobihobihope! [17:06]**

ok but um

they blocked me too

**crabcatcher [17:06]**

wait seriously?

ok everyone check if yoongi and mina have blocked you.

**yoda [17:07]**

that's mean what have i ever done to them?

**tigerrawr [17:07]**

maybe they blocked us so we cant bother them???

just a theory

**nabongs [17:07]**

makes sense

but also hurts :c

**hobihobihope! [17:07]**

ok but fr

whats happening between them??

like im so curious

**detectivekook [17:07]**

ik they're dating

i screamed

**nabongs [17:07]**

yeah

i heard

all the way from OUR DORM

shut the fuck up will ya?

**detectivekook [17:07]**

well since you so kindly asked,

no :)

**nabongs [17:07]**

ill kill you and frame it on jimin

**chimin [17:07]**

WHAT

WHY ME

im his love :((((

**nabongs [17:07]**

yeah thats why

**jinisbest [17:07]**

does any of twice know whats going on between them?

since yoongi would never tell us bc hes a bitch

**crabcatcher [17:07]**

rude.

**godjihyoyourass [17:07]**

um

i can ask

but

im scared

**tigerrawr [17:07]**

ik!!

mina is sUUUper intimidating

**honeypunchsana [17:07]**

i can ask!!!!

**hobihobihope! [17:07]**

honey

i love you

but i dont want you to get hurt :(

**honeypunchsana [17:07]**

but i wont~!!

mina always talks with me

i was the first to know about her and yoongi!!

**detectivekook [17:07]**

wait 

seriously

of all people

**godjihyoyourass [17:08]**

rude

**jeongyeon:) [17:08]**

how did you not spoil it sana

**honeypunchsana [17:08]**

idk!!!!!

i honestly wanted to tell someone super~ badly,,,

but i didnt wanna hurt minari's feelings <3

**hobihobihope! [17:08]**

*heart attack*

**jinisbest [17:08]**

YOU'RE SO SWEET OML

who'd you tell first tho

**honeypunchsana [17:08]**

i told momo

**dancingmomo [17:08]**

hai

**crabcatcher [17:08]**

okay um

no offense

**dubu? [17:08]**

im offended

**crabcatcher [17:08]**

shut up

**nabongs [17:08]**

lol

**crabcatcher [17:08]**

but why would you tell momo?

**honeypunchsana [17:08]**

japanese blood

**crabcatcher [17:08]**

mm.

**jinisbest [17:08]**

lol ok

so are you gonna ask or nah

**honeypunchsana [17:08]**

okaiiiiii

* * *

**shana! [17:09]**

heyyy

minariii

whatcha doin??

**minari [17:09]**

sorry sana

im not in the mood.

**shana! [17:09]**

cmonn!!

please~?

do it for me? <333

**minari [17:09]**

are you sure this isnt a way for you to tell the others what im doing?

because thats rude.

**shana! [17:09]**

nonono!!

it isnt!!

i promise, minari<3

**minari [17:09]**

ok.

well..

um

**shana! [17:09]**

what?

is it uncomfortable to talk about?

**minari [17:09]**

i guess

**shana! [17:10]**

myoui mina.

you know i will never ever judge you

japanese blood!

**minari [17:09]**

lol

okay i know sana

sorry

**shana! [17:10]**

dont be!!!!

**minari [17:10]**

okay!!!

well uh

me and yoongi um

**shana! [17:10]**

split up?

**minari [17:10]**

yes

and he hasn't stopped texting me!

i blocked him

but he figured out a way to contact me!

now we're fighting

and i want it to stop.

**shana! [17:10]**

i heard you blocked everyone in the chat

why?

**minari [17:10]**

i mean

they're annoying!!!

except you

you're cool

**shana! [17:10]**

im telling you

japanese blood!!!

anyways~~,

you were saying?

**minari [17:10]**

the crazy thing is,

i came onto yoongi first??

**shana! [17:10]**

wat

seriously?

wooooowww

**minari [17:10]**

shut up

anyway

since i did,

he's been taking advantage of that

**shana! [17:10]**

how?

is he using it to manipulate you?

**minari [17:10]**

yeah

he's trying so hard to win me back

but i keep saying he wont

and he doesn't understand

he just ignores me

does not give a fuck.

**shana! [17:10]**

i see

why dont me and the others say to back off?

then he'll give you space!!

**minari [17:11]**

thats..

not a bad idea?

but dont say that i told you to

okay?

**shana! [17:11]**

no you didnt

i gave you the idea!!

but i will totally do this for you, minari<3333

japanese blood sisters!

kya!

**minari [17:11]**

thank you, sana<3

**shana! [17:11]**

ofc!!!!

* * *

**honeypunchsana [17:11]**

so mina wants you guys to tell yoongi to shut up

please?

**chimin [17:11]**

he blocked all of us

so 

?

**honeypunchsana [17:11]**

oh

right

**detectivekook [17:12]**

DO NOT WORRY EVERYONE

I HAVE A PLAN

A MARVELOUS PLAN

**nabongs [17:12]**

oh my fucking god can you never not be annoying?

**detectivekook [17:12]**

no

ANYWAYS

i'll go ask yoongi!!!!!!

**godjihyoyourass [17:12]**

uh how is that gonna work?

won't he just yell at you?

**crabcatcher [17:12]**

he just did

**jeongyeon:) [17:12]**

lmao what'd he say

**chimin [17:12]**

do you find my boyfriend's fear HILARIOUS?????

**jeongyeon:) [17:12]**

yes

i do

**chimin [17:13]**

istfg im really gonna fuck you up

**jeongyeon:) [17:13]**

we'll see

**jinisbest [17:13]**

LMAO

THAT WOULD BE HILARIOUS

SEEING THESE TWO MUNCHKINS

FIGHTING

HAHAUSN

sorry typo

**jeongyeon:) [17:13]**

you really laughed hard enough to type it and make a typo?

also wtf we're both built way better than you??

**chimin [17:13]**

yeah who are you to call us munchkins?

YOU ARE A BOARD

**jinisbest [17:13]**

rude

yet true

SHUT UP

**detectivekook [17:13]**

k he unblocked you all

**crabcatcher [17:13]**

WHAT 

HOW DID YOU DO THAT?!

**hobihobihope! [17:13]**

yeah every time i try he just laughs then locks his door

you're fucking lucky

**honeypunchsana [17:13]**

okay well then every one go tell him to shut up and leave minari alone!!!

**yoda [17:13]**

i'll copy and paste!!!

**taebear [17:13]**

there's my girl :)

* * *

**yoongi [17:15]**

did you tell everyone to tell me to shut up and leave minari alone?

cause i just got the same text from everyone

except tae

tae just said idk

?

mina?

hello?

**mina [17:15]**

YES

I DID

BECAUSE YOU CAN'T SHUT UP ON YOUR OWN

**yoongi [17:15]**

i hate you

how can you do this to me?

**mina [17:15]**

if you hate me then stfu and fuck off

istg every single minute im getting 10 more texts from you

Move. On.

**mina [17:16]**

yoongi?

oh so now you don't spam me with stupid shit?

_**This number has blocked you.** _

_**Message not delivered.** _

**mina [17:16]**

well shit

* * *

**jinisbest [17:17]**

STOP PRESSURING MEEE

**yoda [17:17]**

WHAT ARE YOU SO SCARED ABOUT

ADD THE MAN BACK

**tigerrawr [17:17]**

yeah whats there to be scared about?

**crabcatcher [17:17]**

yoongi is pretty fucking scary when he's mad

**chimin [17:17]**

SO ARE YOU

**crabcatcher [17:17]**

yes but im the leader

im just trying to keep you idiots in line

**chimin [17:18]**

oh

ok

**jeongyeon:) [17:18]**

you're just gonna ignore the fact he called you an idiot?

**detectivekook [17:18]**

im with him and he just rolled his eyes with a groan

**jeongyeon:) [17:18]**

lol thats what i wanted

**jinisbest [17:18]**

what if i add mina back first?

**yoda [17:18]**

what about both at the same time?

simultaneously?

**taebear [17:18]**

where did you learn that word, daughter?

its way beyond your vocabulary

**yoda [17:18]**

the holy bible

**taebear [17:18]**

makes sense. 

**jinisbest [17:18]**

wait tzu thats smart

OK IM DOING THAT

**tigerrawr [17:18]**

FINALLY

god damn

**dancingmomo [17:19]**

mina and yoongi are coming back?

are they together again!?

**chimin [17:19]**

no sweetie im sorry

**dancingmomo [17:19]**

they were real cute :((

**chimin [17:19]**

i know sweetie

**jinisbest [17:19]**

k im doing it

 _**jinisbest** _ **added _ohnomina!_**

**_jinisbest_ added _stfu.yoongi_**

**jinisbest [17:19]**

hello

welcome back

how was your vaction?

**ohnomina! [17:19]**

oh it was great

the beaches were beautiful

and the skies

WOW

**stfu.yoongi [17:19]**

don't forget about the food

the food was delicious

and the nightlife?

unforgettable

**jinisbest [17:19]**

i was actually expecting insults but cool

**nabongs [17:20]**

sooo~~~

what happened?

**stfu.yoongi [17:20]**

nothing really

we just broke up

**ohnomina! [17:20]**

nothing?

you're really gonna say what happened was nothing?

**dubu? [17:20]**

omg drama

**stfu.yoongi [17:20]**

yes it was nothing

all i did was try to get you back

**nabongs [17:20]**

cute!

**ohnomina! [17:20]**

so sending me hundreds of texts and leaving a ton of voicemails is you getting me back?

**nabongs [17:20]**

oh nvm

that ain't cute

**stfu.yoongi [17:20]**

shut up

why did you unblock me then?

explain that.

**ohnomina! [17:20]**

BECAUSE YOU KEPT FINDING WAYS TO CONTACT ME

YOU EMAILED ME

**dubu? [17:21]**

no offense but

how are we supposed to ignore this jihyo

i mean

they're full on arguing in front of us. 

**godjihyoyourass [17:21]**

idk

who knows

they clearly don't care

**stfu.yoongi [17:21]**

can you guys please shut the fuck up

**ohnomina! [17:21]**

why so you can just repeat the same thing for the THOUSANDTH time?

**stfu.yoongi [17:21]**

yes

why did you end us?

**jinisbest [17:21]**

WHOOOAAAAA

WHAAAAAAATTTTTTT?????

**hobihobihope! [17:21]**

it was mina?!

i thought it was yoongi lol

**ohnomina! [17:21]**

why are you so surprised 

i mean

i want him to fuck off

**chimin [17:21]**

yeah

because you were upset bc he broke up with you

like me when jungkook checks someone else out that isn't me

**detectivekook [17:21]**

THAT WAS ONE TIME

ARE YOU FOR REAL GONNA HOLD A GRUDGE ON ME BC OF THAT?!

**taebear [17:21]**

there's something seriously wrong with you guys

**crabcatcher [17:21]**

and there isn't anything wrong with you??

**taebear [17:21]**

yeh

**yoda [17:21]**

how dare you say my father is messed up

YOU'RE MESSED UP

**taebear [17:21]**

my baby<333

**ohnomina! [17:22]**

why did you change the settings for me

**stfu.yoongi [17:22]**

and me?

**honeypunchsana [17:22]**

what did seokjinnie change it to?

**jinisbest [17:22]**

seokjinnie changed their settings for requested access

meaning they cant do shit without my consent

**detectivekook [17:22]**

wait so they cant leave the chat?

sick

**jinisbest [17:22]**

you are correct my child

**ohnomina! [17:22]**

rude

**stfu.yoongi [17:22]**

yeah all you idiots do is spam the chat with nonsense

and im trying to get mina back so stfu

**ohnomina! [17:22]**

can you please listen to me

Move.

On.

Please.

**nabongs [17:22]**

oof

mina's mad

**detectivekook [17:22]**

i'll order your tombstone 💀

**stfu.yoongi [17:22]**

shut up

**ohnomina! [17:22]**

seriously?

you're telling me to shut up?

wow

unbelievable.

**stfu.yoongi [17:22]**

i don't understand why you want me to move on

i thought you wanted to get back together

**jinisbest [17:23]**

wait why am i crying

SOMEONE TELL ME WHY IM CRYING

**chimin [17:23]**

I AM TOO

OMG

**jeongyeon:) [17:23]**

ew

**ohnomina! [17:23]**

how in the fucking world did you get that idea?

i mean

i hate you?

**stfu.yoongi [17:23]**

you said that when we were together, you were happy

**ohnomina! [17:23]**

yeah in the beginning

i broke up with you because you were just too much

**stfu.yoongi [17:23]**

how?

how was i too much?

**ohnomina! [17:23]**

hm lets see

oh! you were excessive about every little thing about me

whenever i was bored, hungry, or tired

and..

oh! you said things that felt like you were degrading me.

**stfu.yoongi [17:23]**

what?

what things?

**ohnomina! [17:23]**

does "why do you have to be such a bore" ring a bell?

**dubu? [17:24]**

thats

rude

yet true

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

and it doesn't end there.

"can you ever be a nice, sweet girl?"

"why are you always moody?"

"jeez, can you ever be happy?"

why the fuck wouldn't i have broken up with you?

**stfu.yoongi [17:24]**

fuck

im sorry

shit im so fucking sorry

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

too late.

**crabcatcher [17:24]**

um

so

whats happening

**tigerrawr [17:24]**

i think they're breaking up a second time

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

theres no such thing chae.

yoongi

get out of my life

please.

**stfu.yoongi [17:24]**

can i just..

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

Jesus fucking Christ, what?

**stfu.yoongi [17:24]**

talk to you in person?

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

no

**stfu.yoongi [17:24]**

please! 

i just have some things i wanna say to you

i wont be annoying

or degrade you

i promise

please?

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

fine.

**hobihobihope! [17:24]**

awww

you guys are getting back together

**ohnomina! [17:24]**

no 

we arent

**hobihobihope! [17:24]**

i know lol

**honeypunchsana [17:24]**

good luck yoongi!!!!

**stfu.yoongi [17:25]**

ty

**chimin [17:25]**

i wish you safe travels

**dancingmomo [17:25]**

i want them back as a couple

**chimin [17:25]**

how come, sweetheart?

**dancingmomo [17:25]**

because!!!

i liked them together!

**ohnomina! [17:25]**

yeah but we aren't made for each other

**chimin [17:25]**

and if they want to be apart, then it's their choice.

and why did you think of this?

**dancingmomo [17:25]**

because

i know

**stfu.yoongi [17:25]**

um know what?

**dancingmomo [17:25]**

that you two were made for each other

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR NOT POSTING AT ALL DURING JANUARY IDK WHAT WAS UP BUT IM SUUUUUPER SORRY   
> I ALSO APOLOGIZE FOR NOT POSTING A BDAY FIC FOR JIHYO IM SORRY I LOVE HER with all my heart<3:(((


End file.
